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Government should spend money on railway rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.5

Government should spend money on railway rather than roads. v. 5
Railway has given prominent direction to travelling as it made moving of people easy to far places. I partially agree with the statement that money should be spent on railway projects and not roads as roads maintenance is also important and will discuss my view points in upcoming paragraph. To start with the main point that comes in my is taking care of railway is significant by spending on it as railway travellers counting is in big number eventually this will give comfort to people and that could happen with increase count of train. For instance, on daily basis people in lac travel through rail there should be more count of train for the metro cities. Moreover, there is a need of maintaining station as well with proper cleaning, sitting facilities, enquiry desk, clean food stalls. Explaining rest with the view of road funding is also mandatory for protection of folks because if government does not pay heed on it then this might lead to threatening to the lives of people as it is the way of transporting of short and long distance. Hence, authorities must give attention towards road maintenance by making them wide, proper diversions of vehicles, sign board and signals lights, time to time covering potholes. For example, in 2017 above 20 thousand individuals lost their life because of potholes and many got injured due to accidents. Thus, it is necessary to keep on checking on roads and spend money to keep it fine for public. To conclude, funding on the both means of transport is equally required because both masses use it equally so nothing can be neglected and expenses should be managed for two in same way.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Railway
has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
prominent direction to travelling as it made moving of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
easy to far places. I
partially
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the statement that money should
be spent
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railway
projects and not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
maintenance is
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
and will discuss my view points in upcoming paragraph.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with the main point that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
in my is taking care of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railway
is significant by spending on it as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railway
Possible spelling mistake found.
travellers
counting is in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
number
eventually
this will give comfort to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and that could happen with increase count of train.
For instance
, on daily basis
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in lac travel through rail there should be more count of train for the metro cities.
Moreover
, there is a need of maintaining station
as well
with proper cleaning, sitting facilities,
Possible spelling mistake. 'enquiry' is British English.
enquiry
desk, clean food stalls.

Explaining rest with the view of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
funding is
also
mandatory for protection of folks
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
if
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
does not pay heed on it then this might lead to threatening to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
as it is the way of transporting of short and long distance.
Hence
, authorities
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
give attention towards
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
maintenance by making them wide, proper diversions of vehicles,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sign
board and signals lights, time to time covering potholes.
For example
, in 2017 above 20 thousand individuals lost their
Did you mean "lives"?
life
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of potholes and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
injured due to accidents.
Thus
, it is necessary to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
on checking on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
and spend money to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
it fine for public.

To conclude
, funding on the both means of transport is
equally
required
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
both masses
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
it
equally
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
nothing can
be neglected
and expenses should
be managed
for two in same way.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
13Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Government should spend money on railway rather than roads. v. 5

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
282 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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