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Government should be responsible for funding and controlling a scientific research rather than private organization. To what extent you agree or disagree? v.1

Government should be responsible for funding and controlling a scientific research rather than private organization. v. 1
Some people assert that the government has an obligation to fund and control a science research, while others maintain that it is the responsibility of private firms. In my opinion, I strongly believe that it is the role of government bodies to invest and scrutinize the research work that is for the betterment of society. On the one hand, government authorities mainly fund a scientific finding which is done for the well being of society. In fact, a procedure is adopted before the approval of any financial grant. Provided that research contributes towards the improvement and uplift of humanity, it will likely get a financial assistance from authorities. In addition to it, the government-funded scientific findings are unbiased without involving any sorts of personal interests or susceptible intentions. For instance, a study of drug followed through continuous and impartial test procedures before finally reaching to consumers. Henceforth, government role is imperative for financing and handling the research proposal. On the contrary, research governed by private companies is often driven by profits consideration. These firms are swayed by lucrative profits irrespective consideration of benefits and needs of society. Thus, it is highly likely that a company will fund research unless it forecast their vested interest. Moreover, the outcomes of privately funded studies are often biased. In most of the cases, the researchers and scientists are bribed by private firms to modify the results in their favor, which could lead to grave consequences for public. In conclusion, although private sector is successfully contributing and investing in scientific studies, yet I strongly believe that the government bodies are responsible for investing and handling the research programs.
Some
people
assert that the
government
has an obligation to fund and control a science
research
, while others maintain that it is the responsibility of
private
firms. In my opinion, I
strongly
believe that it is the role of
government
bodies to invest and scrutinize the
research
work
that is
for the betterment of society.

On the one hand,
government
authorities
mainly
fund a scientific finding which
is done
for the
well being
of society. In fact, a procedure
is adopted
before
the approval of any financial grant. Provided that
research
contributes towards the improvement and uplift of humanity, it will likely
get
a financial assistance from authorities.
In addition
to it, the
government
-funded scientific findings
are unbiased
without involving any sorts of personal interests or susceptible intentions.
For instance
, a study of drug followed through continuous and impartial
test
procedures
before
finally
reaching to consumers. Henceforth,
government
role is imperative for financing and handling the
research
proposal.

On the contrary
,
research
governed by
private
companies
is
often
driven by profits consideration. These firms
are swayed
by lucrative profits irrespective consideration of benefits and needs of society.
Thus
, it is
highly
likely that a
company
will fund
research
unless it forecast their vested interest.
Moreover
, the outcomes of
privately
funded studies are
often
biased. In most of the cases, the researchers and scientists
are bribed
by
private
firms to modify the results in their favor, which could lead to grave consequences for public.

In conclusion
, although
private
sector is
successfully
contributing and investing in scientific studies,
yet
I
strongly
believe that the
government
bodies are responsible for investing and handling the
research
programs.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
16Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
The most intimate temper of a people, its deepest soul, is above all in its language.
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IELTS essay Government should be responsible for funding and controlling a scientific research rather than private organization. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
273 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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