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Some people think that international competitive sports such as football bring conflict between people of different age groups and nationalities Others think sport is helping reach understanding between people and nations Discuss both views and give your v.2

Some people think that international competitive sports such as football bring conflict between people of different age groups and nationalities Others think sport is helping reach understanding between people and nations 2
The Impact of international sports event such FIFA has always been a topic of debate. To which, It is believed by a few people that it fuels the tension among different generations and participating nations while others argue that it assist integration between people and countries. In my opinion, although sometimes, as a result of misbehavior or misconduct, it creates bitterness, overall such sports are a great medium to showcase skills, and also enables interaction among nations. To Begin with, there is a huge difference in taste, especially in sports, based on the age group. Majority of young people follow aggressive sports, which requires intense physical strength and immense dedication, whereas old people enjoy calm and respectful sport, such as Chess, which often result in to heated arguments from both groups. At the same time, due to nature of sport, slight misconduct often fuels bitterness among rival countries, which can be misused by politician as oil to the fire to further their cause. For instance, due to well-known rivalry between France and Portugal in FIFA, not only people from both nations hate each other but also their politician used this opportunity to make fun of each other culture. Thus, aggressive sports do create conflict between people and cultures. However, worldwide event like FIFA allows to interact with people from different culture and background, which we may have never heard of if it was not for the competition. A healthy competition not only strengthens the bond among individual but also among culture and provides a platform for better relationships. For example, even after long lasting conflict between India and Pakistan, it is the international cricket, which has bonded the citizens of both nations. Furthermore, people can see other sides of the cultures apart from the negative images projected by media and politicians to leverage the political advantages. Thus, international sport events are beneficial for both individual and nation. In conclusion, competitive sports have both sides, it is up to participants that how resourceful they can make this opportunity. Thus, people should embrace such events with open arms and showcase true sportsmanship to improve the effectiveness.
The Impact of international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
event
such FIFA has always been a topic of debate. To which, It
is believed
by a few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
that it fuels the tension among
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
generations and participating nations while others argue that it assist integration between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and countries. In my opinion, although
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
,
as a result
of misbehavior or misconduct, it creates bitterness,
overall
such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
are a great medium to showcase
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
, and
also
enables interaction among nations.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Begin
with, there is a huge difference in taste,
especially
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
, based on the age group. Majority of young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
follow aggressive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
, which requires intense physical strength and immense dedication, whereas
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
enjoy calm and respectful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
, such as Chess, which
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
result in to heated arguments from both groups. At the same time, due to nature of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
, slight misconduct
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
fuels bitterness among rival countries, which can
be misused
by politician as oil to the fire to
further
their cause.
For instance
, due to well-known rivalry between France and Portugal in FIFA, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from both nations hate each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
their politician
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
this opportunity to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
fun of each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
.
Thus
, aggressive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
do create conflict between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and cultures.

However
, worldwide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
event
like FIFA
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
Did you mean "interacting"? Or maybe you should add a pronoun? In active voice, 'allow' + 'to' takes an object, usually a pronoun.
to interact
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
and background, which we may have never heard of if it was not for the competition. A healthy competition not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
strengthens the bond among individual
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
and provides a platform for better relationships.
For example
, even after
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
long lasting
conflict between India and Pakistan, it is the international cricket, which has bonded the citizens of both nations.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
sides of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
apart from the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
images projected by media and politicians to leverage the political advantages.
Thus
, international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
events
are beneficial for both individual and nation.

In conclusion
, competitive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
have both sides, it is up to participants that how resourceful they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
this opportunity.
Thus
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should embrace such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
events
with open arms and showcase true sportsmanship to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the effectiveness.
18Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
29Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
A different language is a different vision of life.
Federico Fellini

IELTS essay Some people think that international competitive sports such as football bring conflict between people of different age groups and nationalities Others think sport is helping reach understanding between people and nations 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
354 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
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  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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