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Government investment in the arts, such as music and theatre, is a waste of money. Governments must invest this money in public services instead. To what extent do you agree with this statement? ? v.3

Government investment in the arts, such as music and theatre, is a waste of money. Governments must invest this money in public services instead. ? v. 3
It is irrefutable that funding of the entertainment industry by the government is as crucial as investment in public services. I agree that these two serves different purposes and are beneficial to the citizens of society and require government funding. Today so many museums and theatres are functional because of government involvement. It is believed that without this support, art which portrays the culture and heritage of the people will go extinct. In Britain for instance, The British Museum has stood the taste of time because the government invest so much in it. Therefore, it is necessary to pass cultural knowledge about a society to the younger generation and with the political investment, art and theatres will certainly be preserved. In addition, services rendered by the music industry, art exhibitions at the theatres are sources of entertainment to the people. To illustrate, in bustling cities like New York, studies show that a large number of people spend their weekends attending music concerts, theatres and car exhibitions. On the whole, these industry help people enjoy their social life. Finally, this entertainment sector generates it own wealth from tourists and create employment for citizens of the nation. To clarify, a tourist looks forward to visit so many appealing sites which are art related. This helps to improve economy of the society and create job opportunities. Public services such as education, health care, electricity, good road network, clean water and other basic services are necessities which also requires government financing. The citizens deserve reformed education, equipped hospitals which are part of the social amenities provided by government. Therefore, funding in these various sectors are equally essential for human survival. In conclusion, every sector in the society is relevant and non is more superior than the other. Funds should be disbursed in each of them by the government to ensure continuity of each one of them.
It is irrefutable that funding of the entertainment industry by the
government
is as crucial as investment in public
services
. I
agree
that these two serves
different
purposes and are beneficial to the citizens of
society
and require
government
funding.

Today
so
many
museums and
theatres
are functional
because
of
government
involvement. It
is believed
that without this support,
art
which portrays the culture and heritage of the
people
will go extinct. In Britain
for instance
, The British Museum has stood the taste of time
because
the
government
invest
so
much in it.
Therefore
, it is necessary to pass cultural knowledge about a
society
to the younger generation and with the political investment,
art
and
theatres
will
certainly
be preserved
.
In addition
,
services
rendered by the music industry,
art
exhibitions at the
theatres
are sources of entertainment to the
people
. To illustrate, in bustling cities like New York, studies
show
that
a large number of
people
spend their weekends attending music concerts,
theatres
and car exhibitions.
On the whole
, these industry
help
people
enjoy their social life.
Finally
, this entertainment sector generates it
own
wealth from tourists and create employment for citizens of the nation. To clarify, a tourist looks forward
to visit
so
many
appealing sites which are
art
related. This
helps
to
improve
economy of the
society
and create job opportunities.

Public
services
such as education, health care, electricity,
good
road network, clean water and other basic
services
are necessities which
also
requires
government
financing. The citizens deserve reformed education, equipped hospitals which are part of the social amenities provided by
government
.
Therefore
, funding in these various sectors are
equally
essential for human survival.

In conclusion
, every sector in the
society
is relevant and non is
more superior than
the other. Funds should
be disbursed
in each of them by the
government
to ensure continuity of each one of them.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
23Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Government investment in the arts, such as music and theatre, is a waste of money. Governments must invest this money in public services instead. ? v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
312 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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