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Genetic engineering is a dangerous trend. It should be limited. To what extent do you agree? v.1

Genetic engineering is a dangerous trend. It should be limited. v. 1
Genetic engineering all over the world has being developed more since duplication sheep which is called Dolly found. There are benefits and downsides in this great biotechnology. I will argue that the genetic engineering has affected to live longer and to live a better life. However, I think that we should consider its unexpectable and negative effects at a same time. To begin with, people can live longer with treatment and they can eat much better food from GMO products. For instance, after the stem cell was discovered, incredibly, many patients who are suffering from incurable diseases can become to be curable. In addition, the genetic manipulated crops have so strong features against pests that we can eat good quality foods and it is also environmentally-friendly because of the decreasing usage of pesticides and fertilizers. Hence, I’ve assorted that the genetic engineering makes us healthier and our life expectancy becomes longer. In contrast, we shouldn’t overlook negative aspects of the genetic engineering. The development of the genetic engineering can lead ethic issues and side effects. We don’t know well about these problems yet because it has only around 30 year’s history. In fact, the Dolly as a successful result lived for 7 years but it had some problems. Therefore, I believe that the genetic engineering could be so dangerous that we should take into account its problem when we get it. In conclusion, although there are some unexpectable downsides, I think that the genetic engineering should be encouraged in order to live a better life on one condition which we should consider negative effects.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Genetic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
engineering
all over the world has
being developed
more since duplication sheep which
is called
Dolly found. There are benefits and downsides in this great biotechnology. I will argue that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
genetic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
engineering
has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
longer and to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
a better life.
However
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that we should consider its
Possible spelling mistake found.
unexpectable
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects at a same time.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
longer with
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
treatment and
they can eat much better food from GMO products.
For instance
, after the stem cell
was discovered
,
incredibly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
patients who are suffering from incurable diseases can become to be curable.
In addition
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
genetic
manipulated crops have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
strong features against pests that we can eat
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
quality foods and it is
also
environmentally
-friendly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the decreasing usage of pesticides and fertilizers.
Hence
, I’ve assorted that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
genetic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
engineering
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
us healthier and our life expectancy becomes longer.

In contrast
, we shouldn’t overlook
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
aspects of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
genetic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
engineering
. The development of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
genetic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
engineering
can lead ethic issues and side effects. We don’t know well about these problems
yet
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
around 30 year’s history. In fact, the Dolly as a successful result
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lived
for 7 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it had
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
problems.
Therefore
, I believe that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
genetic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
engineering
could be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
that we should take into account its problem when we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
it.

In conclusion
, although there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Possible spelling mistake found.
unexpectable
downsides, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
genetic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
engineering
should
be encouraged
in order to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
a better life on one condition which we should consider
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
19Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes
Learning another language is not only learning different words for the same things, but learning another way to think about things.
Flora Lewis

IELTS essay Genetic engineering is a dangerous trend. It should be limited. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
264 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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