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Fossil fuels are the main source of energy around the world. However, people are being encouraged to use alternative energy sources such as wind energy, solar energy and so on. Do you think this is a positive or negative development? v.1

Fossil fuels are the main source of energy around the world. However, people are being encouraged to use alternative energy sources such as wind energy, solar energy and so on. Do you think this is a positive or negative development? v. 1
Oil and gas is one of our main sources of energy and it is a popular pressing problem that the society lives above its demand. Although people and the society are heavily relying on fossil fuel energy, the effort and the commitment made by people for maximizing the potential opportunities of alternative energy resources are definitely a positive development. First and foremost, it is acknowledged by many professionals and the general public that the fossilized fuels are bound to be depleted; simply put, the availability of the source is strictly limited. To elaborate, studies completed by statisticians and environmentalists suspect that the oil and gas will face its energy lifetime in less than 50 years from now. For the sake of continued usage of the modern technology, it is strongly recommended to encourage the use of alternative energy sources, which do not have its concerns over the availability in the near future. Secondly, another positive aspect of the alternative resources, such as wind and solar energy, lies on the fact that it demonstrates minimal impact on the air qualities, especially in the metropolitan areas. Fossil fuel, when it is burned, releases the carbon dioxide that exacerbates the degree of air pollution. In order to save the environment, people are demonstrating their initiative to improve the pollution level by using the alternative resources; it is definitely a responsible action exerted by general public, which is considered as a positive development in our society. To conclude, although people are heavily dependent on fossil fuels nowadays, they are now aware of its limit, and the effort and the commitment to save the environment by supporting the alternative energy resources is definitely a good sign in our society.
Oil and gas is one of our main sources of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
and it is a popular pressing problem that the society
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
above its demand. Although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and the society are
heavily
relying on fossil
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuel
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
, the effort and the commitment made by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
for maximizing the potential opportunities of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alternative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
resources are definitely a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
development.

First
and foremost, it
is acknowledged
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
professionals and the
Consider using "public".
general public
that the fossilized
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuels
are bound
to
be depleted
;
simply
put, the availability of the source is
strictly
limited. To elaborate, studies completed by statisticians and environmentalists suspect that the oil and gas will face its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
lifetime in less than 50 years from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
. For the sake of continued usage of the modern technology, it is
strongly
The verb 'recommended' is used with the gerund form: "recommended encouraging".
recommended to encourage
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alternative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
sources, which do not have its concerns over the availability in the near future.

Secondly
, another
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
aspect of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alternative
resources, such as wind and solar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
, lies on the fact that it demonstrates minimal impact on the air qualities,
especially
in the metropolitan areas. Fossil
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuel
, when it
is burned
, releases the carbon dioxide that exacerbates the degree of air pollution. In order to save the environment,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are demonstrating their initiative to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the pollution level by using the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alternative
resources; it is definitely a responsible action exerted by
Consider using "public".
general public
, which
is considered
as a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
development in our society.

To conclude
, although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
heavily
dependent on fossil
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuels
nowadays, they are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
aware of its limit, and the effort and the commitment to save the environment by supporting the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alternative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
resources is definitely a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sign
in our society.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
20Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes
A foreign language is like a frail, delicate muscle. If you do not use it, it weakens.
Jhumpa Lahiri

IELTS essay Fossil fuels are the main source of energy around the world. However, people are being encouraged to use alternative energy sources such as wind energy, solar energy and so on. Do you think this is a positive or negative development? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
284 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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