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Foreign visitors should pay more than local visitors for cultural and historical attractions. What is your opinion of this. v.11

Foreign visitors should pay more than local visitors for cultural and historical attractions. What is your opinion of this. v. 11
Introduction: There are opinions saying that we should charge foreign tourists more than local tourists to visit cultural and historical attractions. Although this may sound reasonable, I disagree with it and justifications are as follows. There is a wide array of reasons, however, the main one that accounts for my disagreement is that this may reduce the amount of foreign tourists visiting the sites. As an explanation for this, if the overseas visitors realized that they are paying more than the native ones to observe the same historical and cultural symbol, they will feel like being discriminated, which will result in a negative attitude towards the country. Thus, this will keep the foreigners from coming to admire the attractions. Another significant reason is that the extra effort required for categorizing the tourists, leading to the extra consumption of time and financial resources. Particularly, in order to conclude whether a tourist is a foreign person or a local one, it requires more than just the observation of the face or the language they say and items such as ID cards will be shown. For example, a Vietnamese who settles in the US cannot be claimed as a local person in Vietnam, while an American who was born and raised up in Vietnam is. And checking ID card is a process requiring time and money, as they have to see if the IDs are fake or not. Conclusion: In summary, there is a wide range of policies that can increase the profit from tourism in Vietnam. Nonetheless, increasing ticket price for foreign tourists is not one of them.
Introduction: There are opinions saying that we should charge
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
more than local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
to visit cultural and historical attractions. Although this may sound reasonable, I disagree with it and justifications are as follows.

There is a wide array of reasons,
however
, the main one that accounts for my disagreement is that this may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the amount of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
visiting the sites. As an explanation for this, if the overseas visitors realized that they are paying more than the native ones to observe the same historical and cultural symbol, they will feel like
being discriminated
, which will result in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
attitude towards the country.
Thus
, this will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
the foreigners from coming to admire the attractions.

Another significant reason is that the extra effort required for categorizing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
, leading to the extra consumption of time and financial resources.
Particularly
, in order
to conclude
whether a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourist
is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
person or a local one, it requires more than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
the observation of the face or the language they say and items such as ID cards will
be shown
.
For example
, a Vietnamese who settles in the US cannot
be claimed
as a local person in Vietnam, while an American who
was born
and raised up in Vietnam is. And checking ID card is a process requiring time and money, as they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
if the IDs are fake or not.

Conclusion: In summary, there is a wide range of policies that can increase the profit from tourism in Vietnam. Nonetheless, increasing ticket price for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
is not one of them.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay Foreign visitors should pay more than local visitors for cultural and historical attractions. What is your opinion of this. v. 11

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
266 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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