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For the past five years, there has been no increase in tuition and fees have remained the same, but now the university has decided to increase tuition by 5% each year for the next four years for all students. This raise in tuition will begin next fall sem v.1

For the past five years, there has been no increase in tuition and fees have remained the same, but now the university has decided to increase tuition by 5% each year for the next four years for all students. This raise in tuition will begin next fall sem v. 1
Contemporary, working parents are increasing to compare with a few decades ago that have happened before the oil crisis or the bubble burst. Many families live far away from their parent's home, the parents cannot leave their child to own parents. I have suggested two reasons a cause of increasing working parents. Firstly, a price has been increased is one of reason, for example, school tuitions, foods and a housing roan etc. You could go to school cheaper than now. Therefore, the mother has to work as father because they do not afford pay them with only father's wage. Despite the school tuitions are enormous amount of prices, they have to pay until a child graduate to university. Secondly, women were advancing in society actively than a few decades ago. It was basic and typical thinking way that after got married women stay at home then become house wives and look after a child, but it has changed along with the era. Because, a feminist manifesto has developed and women have attended equality of right. Now, working women is not an odd situation. However, the children are likely to feel lonely and to want affection more. Perhaps, they may not talk about a daily occurrence or troubles. On the other hand, a child is staying at home alone would suggest dangerous situations. If a child could not discern whether the person is good or bad, the child might let the person come to home. What is more, a child would burn if trying to cook or use the cooker because a child did not know how to use it, but had curious. To sum up, the parents have many reasons that to become working parents, but it is the truth that stays home only children is exposed at dangerous situation. The parents need to recognize to children carefully and talking with them more than usual.
Contemporary,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
are increasing to compare with a few decades ago that have happened
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
the oil crisis or the bubble burst.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
families
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
far away from their parent's home, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
parents.

I have suggested two reasons a cause of increasing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
.
Firstly
, a price has
been increased
is one of reason,
for example
, school
Possible spelling mistake found.
tuitions
, foods and a housing roan etc. You could go to school cheaper than
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
.
Therefore
, the mother
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
work as father
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they do not afford pay them with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
father's wage. Despite the school
Possible spelling mistake found.
tuitions
are enormous amount of prices, they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
pay until a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
graduate to university.
Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
were advancing in society
Use "(actively)" to make a comparison with this adjective.
actively
than a few decades ago. It was basic and typical thinking way that after
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
married
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
stay at home then become
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
wives and look after a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
along with the era.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
, a feminist manifesto has developed and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
have attended equality of right.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Now
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
is not an odd situation.

However
, the children are likely to feel lonely and to want affection more. Perhaps, they may not talk about a daily occurrence or troubles.
On the other hand
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
is staying at home alone would suggest
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
situations. If a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
could not discern whether the person is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
might
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
the person
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
to home.
What is more
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
would burn if trying to cook or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the cooker
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
did not know how to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
it,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
had curious.

To sum up, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
reasons that to become
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
working
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it is the truth that stays home
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
children
is exposed
at
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
situation. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
need to recognize to children
carefully
and talking with them more than usual.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay For the past five years, there has been no increase in tuition and fees have remained the same, but now the university has decided to increase tuition by 5% each year for the next four years for all students. This raise in tuition will begin next fall sem v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
315 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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