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Experts say older people were happier and healthier in the past because they did more exercise and spent more time with family and friends, whereas now many suffer loneliness and health problems. What are the causes of this and what are some solutions? v.3

Experts say older people were happier and healthier in the past because they did more exercise and spent more time with family and friends, whereas now many suffer loneliness and health problems. What are the causes of this and what are some solutions? v. 3
In the past, the elderly led a healthier and happier life. But, nowadays the situation has changed significantly. There are various possible reasons behind this emerging issues related to loneliness in older people's lives. However, there are some combating strategies to tackle the problem wisely. Being alone is not a new phenomenon. People of all ages and nationalities face it from time to time. While loneliness can affect all people, the older people are the worst hit by this problem. Part of this problem can be attributed to the rise of nuclear families. Families all over the world are becoming smaller and smaller. While youngsters who spend a considerable part of their away from home have plenty of opportunities to socialize, their older parents and grandparents have few outing options which severely limit their chances of interacting with other people. Old age is also a period of physical inactivity. Few older people even bother to step out of their home. To overcome loneliness older people must keep themselves engaged in meaningful activities. They can go a walk in the morning or in the evening. It will give them physical exercise. It will also give them an opportunity to meet and interact with other people. They can join clubs or they can pursue other interests. By keeping themselves constantly engaged in something or the other they can overcome loneliness. What is more, when they are physically fit they will feel better about themselves and that will add a whole new layer of meaning to life.
In the past, the elderly led a healthier and happier life.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, nowadays the situation has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
significantly
. There are various possible reasons behind this emerging issues related to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
loneliness
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
older
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
However
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
combating strategies to tackle the problem
wisely
.

Being alone is not a new phenomenon.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
of all ages and nationalities face it from time to time. While
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
loneliness
can affect all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are the worst hit by this problem. Part of this problem can
be attributed
to the rise of nuclear families. Families all over the world are becoming smaller and smaller. While youngsters who spend a considerable part of their away from home have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of opportunities to socialize, their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
older
parents and grandparents have few outing options which
severely
limit their chances of interacting with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Old
age is
also
a period of physical inactivity. Few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
even bother to step out of their home.

To overcome
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
loneliness
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
themselves engaged in meaningful activities. They can go a walk in the morning or in the evening. It will give them physical exercise. It will
also
give them an opportunity to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
and interact with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. They can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
join
clubs or they can pursue
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
interests. By keeping themselves
constantly
engaged in something or the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
they can overcome
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
loneliness
.
What is more
, when they are
physically
fit they will feel better about themselves and that will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
a whole new layer of meaning to life.
4Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
20Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes
If we spoke a different language, we would perceive a somewhat different world.
Ludwig Wittgenstein

IELTS essay Experts say older people were happier and healthier in the past because they did more exercise and spent more time with family and friends, whereas now many suffer loneliness and health problems. What are the causes of this and what are some solutions? v. 3

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
254 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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