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Everybody should be allowed admission to university study programs regardless of their level of academic ability. agree or disagree? Give reasons and example. v.3

Everybody should be allowed admission to university study programs regardless of their level of academic ability. agree or disagree? Give reasons and example. v. 3
In this new modern world, all skills are necessary, the more skills you have therefore more chance for you to success in your professional life, good qualifications related to one’s area of work are the most important. Great capabilities will help individuals to do well in their jobs. Accordingly of knowing their job, studying in university is the best choice to improve the qualification needed for their job, they will bring a better execution at work, such as by forwardly taking on testing assignments, which will make them be seen more by their administrators and supervisors. In the long run, this will give a positive impression, giving better execution examinations, which would be highly beneficial for their profession. Thus, education plays a crucial play for professional success. Consequently, instruction assumes a significant job for proficient achievement. Great capabilities give access to helpful business openings. This is on the grounds that having them empower individuals to get numerous jobs, the same number of managers demand certain capabilities from a planned worker, an individual without these would not have the chance to go after the position. It’s better that we focus on the qualification we need rather than social skills, since social skills are easy to be trained or learn. Qualification also took more time to be mastered so we should focus more on our qualification. In conclusion, it is shown that good qualification is needed for individuals to be effective in their expert lives on the grounds that these help in performing great in their job and give them a chance to get a better job. If individuals dream to have effective career, they should concentrate on getting the qualification for the job.
In this new modern world, all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
are necessary, the more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
you have
therefore
more chance for you to success in your professional life,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
qualifications
related to one’s area of work are the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
.

Great capabilities will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
to do well in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Accordingly
of knowing their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
, studying in university is the best choice to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
qualification
needed for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
, they will bring a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
execution at work, such as by
forwardly
taking on testing assignments, which will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
more by their administrators and supervisors. In the long run, this will give a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
impression, giving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
execution examinations, which would be
highly
beneficial for their profession.
Thus
, education plays a crucial play for professional success.

Consequently
, instruction assumes a significant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
for proficient achievement. Great capabilities give access to helpful business openings. This is on the grounds that having them empower
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
numerous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
, the same number of managers demand certain capabilities from a planned worker, an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
without these would not have the chance to go after the position. It’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
that we focus on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
qualification
we need
rather
than social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
, since social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
are easy to
be trained
or learn.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Qualification
also
took more time to
be mastered
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
we should focus more on our qualification.

In conclusion
, it
is shown
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
qualification
is needed
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
to be effective in their expert
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
on the grounds that these
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
in performing great in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
and give them a chance to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
dream to have effective career, they should concentrate on getting the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
qualification
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
27Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Everybody should be allowed admission to university study programs regardless of their level of academic ability. agree or disagree? Give reasons and example. v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
282 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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