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Essay topics: You have seen an advertisement in an Australian magazine for someone to live with a familyfor six months and look after their six- year-old child. Write a letter to the parents. In your letter- Explain why you would like the job- give details v.1

Essay topics: You have seen an advertisement in an Australian magazine for someone to live with a familyfor six months and look after their six- year-old child. Write a letter to the parents. In your letter- Explain why you would like the job- give details v. 1
It's believed by some that giving children the chance to make their own decisions on a daily basis is expected to raise a society of selfish individuals. However, others think that it is vital for children to be given the chance to make their choices regarding things that affect them like what they eat, wear, or watch. There are many aspects that parents should consider when raising a child, children must be taught how to choose and how to differentiate between what is right and what is wrong. This will allow them to grow with fine skills, and will train them to take the responsibility for their own actions. Furthermore, they will grow up into being independent individuals who will be able to deal with life challenges and conflicts that they may face on the long term. On the contrary, children by nature are prone to making mistakes, so, if a child is permitted to make his own choices without any guidance, he may fail to consider other's feelings. This is detrimental to the growth of children, it will indeed result in a society of self-centred individuals. For instance, a child may insist to watch a certain cartoon while other family members want to watch something else, if he is always allowed to have it his way, he will probably grow up into being a spoiled selfish person. In conclusion, I think parents must grant their youngsters the liberty to make up their own minds while teaching them to respect others and realize the importance of considering other individuals feelings.
It's believed by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
that giving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
the chance to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
decisions on a daily basis is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expected
to raise a society of selfish
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
.
However
, others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it is vital for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
the chance to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
their choices regarding things that affect them like what they eat, wear, or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
.

There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
aspects that parents should consider when raising a child,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be taught
how to choose and how to differentiate between what is right and what is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
. This will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
them to grow with fine
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
, and will train them to take the responsibility for their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
actions.
Furthermore
, they will grow up into being independent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
who will be able to deal with life challenges and conflicts that they may face on the long term.

On the contrary
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
by nature are prone to making mistakes,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
, if a child
is permitted
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
his
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
choices without any guidance, he may fail to consider other's feelings. This is detrimental to the growth of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
, it will
indeed
result in a society of
Possible spelling mistake found.
self-centred
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
.
For instance
, a child may insist to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
a certain cartoon while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
family members want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
something else, if he is always
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to have it his way, he will
probably
grow up into being a spoiled selfish person.

In conclusion
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
parents
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
grant their youngsters the liberty to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
up their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
minds while teaching them to respect others and realize the importance of considering
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
feelings.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Essay topics: You have seen an advertisement in an Australian magazine for someone to live with a familyfor six months and look after their six- year-old child. Write a letter to the parents. In your letter- Explain why you would like the job- give details v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
260 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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