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Essay topics: Some people think that good health is a basic human need, so the medical service should not be run by profit-making companies. Do you think the disadvantages of private health care outweigh the advantages? v.1

Essay topics: Some people think that good health is a basic human need, so the medical service should not be run by profit-making companies. Do you think the disadvantages of private health care outweigh the advantages? v. 1
In decades, guaranteed health life is of vital importance in our society. While people think that health service shouldn’t be controlled by privately operated medical companies, I would argue that there are more advantages for people to use private health services. On the one hand, private hospitals have their own negative impacts. Firstly, because the government couldn’t set a restriction on prices in private health institutions, they would be able to set high fees for their services such as prescription charges and high-tech machines in the operating theatre. As the result, this may discriminate significantly against those who have a low or modest income as they cannot afford the costs of care or treatment. Secondly, the ultimate aim of private – run medical services is to gain profits so that they pay much more attention to the quantity rather than the quality of services. For example, in some private clinics, there are fewer experienced and qualified medical practitioners as advertised, hence, they don’t come up to the patients’ expectations. On the other hand, there are some reasons why citizens should go to private health institutions for medical services. The first one is that privately-owned hospitals provide faster services, compared to public ones, so there is no need for patients to wait in the long line. Consequently, it would be less time consuming for either patients with life-threatening diseases or those coming for regular check-up to get treatment. In addition, it is easier for people to get access to private services rather than state-owned services in remote areas. For instance, there are more and more private health institutions built mountainous areas which provide a good opportunity for patients to have improved health care, especially those from minority group. In conclusion, despite drawbacks being provided by profit – making corporations, it seems to me that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages and people should have medical services in private hospitals
In decades, guaranteed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
life is of vital importance in our society. While
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
shouldn’t
be controlled
by
privately
operated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
, I would argue that there are more advantages for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
services.

On the one hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
hospitals have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impacts.
Firstly
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
couldn’t set a restriction on prices in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
institutions, they would be able to set high fees for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
such as prescription charges and high-tech machines in the operating
Possible spelling mistake. 'theatre' is British English.
theatre
. As the result, this may discriminate
significantly
against those who have a low or modest income as they cannot afford the costs of care or treatment.
Secondly
, the ultimate aim of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
–
run
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
is to gain profits
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they pay much more attention to the quantity
rather
than the quality of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
.
For example
, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
clinics, there are fewer experienced and qualified
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
practitioners as advertised,
hence
, they don’t
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
up to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
patients’
expectations.

On the other hand
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
reasons why citizens should go to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
institutions for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
. The
first
one is that
privately
-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
owned
hospitals provide faster
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
, compared to public ones,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
there is no need for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
patients
to wait in the long line.
Consequently
, it would be less
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
time consuming
for either
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
patients
with life-threatening diseases or those coming for regular
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
-up to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
treatment.
In addition
, it is easier for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
access to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
rather
than state-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
owned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
in remote areas.
For instance
, there are more and more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
institutions built mountainous areas which provide a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
opportunity for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
patients
to have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
care,
especially
those from minority group.

In conclusion
, despite drawbacks
being provided
by profit
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
–
making corporations, it seems to me that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
medical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
hospitals
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay Essay topics: Some people think that good health is a basic human need, so the medical service should not be run by profit-making companies. Do you think the disadvantages of private health care outweigh the advantages? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
316 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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