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Environmental protection is the responsibility of politicians, not individuals as individuals can do too little. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.2

Environmental protection is the responsibility of politicians, not individuals as individuals can do too little. v. 2
In today's modern world, protecting environment from the polloution is a big challenge. The damage to nature is increasing at an alarming rate mainly due to human activities and lack of strict rules and regulations from government end. Fewer people believe that protecting the environment is the main duty of higher officials. However, a large number of members from society think that an individual plays an vital role in saving ecosystem. In my opinion, both have an important role to play which I will be going to discuss further in this essay. To begin with, one of the major reason through which government bodies can save our climate is by implementating new policies and laws which would be more strict and non compliance would lead higher penalty for all residents. In addition to this, political parties should ban harmful products which is damaging our nature. For instance, State governement has passed the laws in which they have banned the usage of single plastic for any domestic or commercial use. Secondly, officials can also allocate funds in spreading awareness among residents for planting more trees due to which they can have more greener community. On the other hand, citizens should also act responsible in saving our external environment. One way of nonadhering would be damaging nature for commercial use such as making building or apartment in the highly plantation areas. Furthermore, every household or commercial factories should have proper disposal waste management in their system so that wastage would not pollute nearby surroundings. Not only this, people can also shift to renewable energy sources which could be used in electricity production purpose and in this way they can save environment along with it's very economical too. In conclusion, politicians and individuals both need to act in a responsible way in order to protect environment.
In
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's modern world, protecting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
from the
Possible spelling mistake found.
polloution
is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
challenge. The damage to nature is increasing at an alarming rate
mainly
due to human activities and lack of strict
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and regulations from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
. Fewer
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that protecting the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
is the main duty of higher officials.
However
,
Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use "many" or "numerous"
a large number of
members from society
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that an individual plays
Use "a" instead of 'an' if the following word doesn't start with a vowel sound, e.g. 'a sentence', 'a university'
an
vital role in saving ecosystem. In my opinion, both have an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role to play which I will be going to discuss
further
in this essay.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, one of the major reason through which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
bodies can save our climate is by
Possible spelling mistake found.
implementating
new policies and laws which would be more strict and
This expression is normally spelled as one or with hyphen.
non compliance
would lead higher penalty for all residents.
In addition
to this, political parties should ban harmful products which is damaging our nature.
For instance
, State
Possible spelling mistake found.
governement
has passed the laws in which they have banned the usage of single plastic for any domestic or commercial
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
.
Secondly
, officials can
also
allocate funds in spreading awareness among residents for planting more trees due to which they can have
Use only "greener" (without 'more') when you use the comparative.
more greener
community.

On the other hand
, citizens should
also
act responsible in saving our external
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
. One way of
Possible spelling mistake found.
nonadhering
would be damaging nature for commercial
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
such as making building or apartment in the
highly
plantation areas.
Furthermore
, every household or commercial factories should have proper disposal waste management in their system
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that wastage would not pollute nearby surroundings. Not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
this,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can
also
shift to renewable energy sources which could be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in electricity production purpose and in this way they can save
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
along with
Did you mean "its" (possessive pronoun) instead of 'it's' (=it is)?
it's
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
economical too.

In conclusion
, politicians and individuals both need to act
Consider replacing "in a responsible way" with the adverb for "responsible"; e.g., "in a hasty manner" with "hastily".
in a responsible way
in order to protect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environment
.
14Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
10Mistakes

IELTS essay Environmental protection is the responsibility of politicians, not individuals as individuals can do too little. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
303 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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