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Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree. Discuss both these views and give your opinion. v.10

Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree. v. 10
Company owners take extra details of personal level from their employees before employing them in their companies. Therefore, some people agree that it helps company to judge their workers in a better way. While, some contradict this by saying that it is completely useless. I personally believe that it is the right of the business domain to know about the details related to a worker’s life. This essay will discuss this scenario, using the examples of Oxford University Research and Time Magazine survey to demonstrate points and support claims. On the one hand, some people advocate that the details related to a personal life is a must to know thing for any organization. Because, you can’t know the attitude of an employee without knowing its habits or life style. Furthermore, it also helps to decide the salary brackets of that person –married gets more as compared to bachelor. For example, Oxford University in 2015 researched on the employers right to know about the lives of those working with them and find out that companies will go in loss if they stop keeping their employee personal records. So, from this example it is clear, that personal information is the right of employer to know. On the other hand, some people consider this a fruitless activity. As employees sometimes lie about their skills and habits. Additionally, people want to keep their official life separate from their own life. Similarly, a survey of Time Magazine suggests the same story, that 60% people don’t like that their managers ask about their personal life. So, from this examples, it is clear that some people are very touchy about their own life and they don’t want it to share it even with their bosses. To conclude, being possessive about own life is good, but business is also a second home of every person. So, in my view, it is useful to keep full worker details either it is personal or not, in any organization. In the future, it is better that governments will legalize this by making it compulsory for job personals to share their basic information with their employing domains.
Company
owners take extra
details
of
personal
level from their
employees
before
employing them in their
companies
.
Therefore
,
some
people
agree
that it
helps
company
to judge their workers in a better way.
While
,
some
contradict this by saying that it is completely useless. I
personally
believe that it is the right of the business domain to
know
about the
details
related to a worker’s
life
. This essay will discuss this scenario, using the
examples
of Oxford University Research and Time Magazine survey to demonstrate points and support claims.

On the one hand,
some
people
advocate that the
details
related to a
personal
life
is a
must to
know
thing for any organization.
Because
, you can’t
know
the attitude of an
employee
without knowing its habits or
life
style.
Furthermore
, it
also
helps
to decide the salary brackets of that person –married
gets
more
as
compared to bachelor. For
example
, Oxford University in 2015 researched on the employers right to
know
about the
lives
of those working with them and find out that
companies
will go in loss if they
stop
keeping their
employee
personal
records.
So
, from this
example
it is
clear
, that
personal
information is the right of employer to know.

On the other hand
,
some
people
consider this a fruitless activity. As
employees
sometimes
lie about their
skills
and habits.
Additionally
,
people
want to
keep
their official
life
separate from their
own
life
.
Similarly
, a survey of Time Magazine suggests the same story, that 60%
people
don’t like that their managers ask about their
personal
life
.
So
, from
this
examples
, it is
clear
that
some
people
are
very
touchy about their
own
life and
they don’t want it to share it even with their bosses.

To conclude
, being possessive about
own
life
is
good
,
but
business is
also
a second home of every person.
So
, in my view, it is useful to
keep
full worker
details
either it is
personal
or not, in any organization. In the future, it is better that
governments
will legalize this by making it compulsory for job personals to share their basic information with their employing domains.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
40Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes

IELTS essay Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say that this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree. v. 10

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
355 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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