Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Education is a critical element of the prosperity of any nation. The more educated the people of the country are, more successful their nation becomes. v.1

Education is a critical element of the prosperity of any nation. The more educated the people of the country are, more successful their nation becomes. v. 1
Education is surely one of the most crucial sectors of every nation. The prosperity of a country is directly proportional to the number of educated citizens. I assent to this affirmation to a great extent. Opponents may opine that the skills are necessary for developments, not the education as many of the famous personalities of the world like Albert Einstein, Thomas Edison, and Bill gates were among school and college dropouts. They brought big revolutions in their respective fields without any formal education. However, I would say that ratio of such people is very low. Therefore, we cannot underestimate the power of formal education. As it has become one of the mandatory conditions for even job applicants. Take an example MNCs engaged in software production, they are more likely to employ candidates who are degree holders rather than those who have the required skill but no evidence of their skills in terms of education.   Thus, firms only believe in educated youth to contribute in productive ways to the prosperity of their nation. Education is the basic needs for a skilled person and it is very unlike that without proper education a skilled generation would automatically build. There is a huge difference between an electric engineer who has a Masters degree from a reputed university and an electric technician who works in a shop. The former one is the type of people a nation needs for development while the later one helps people to complete their electric connections and repairing. Moreover, it has been observed that developed countries have a high literacy rate than the developing and under developed nations. This clearly bears the testimony of the fact that education is the reason behind their progress. So, educated populaces do affect the flourishing capabilities of the country. Therefore, it should be taken care of. In a compendium, I would say that education and prosperity of a country are closely correlated to each other.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Education
is
surely
one of the most crucial sectors of every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
. The prosperity of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
is
directly
proportional to the number of educated citizens. I assent to this affirmation to a great extent.

Opponents may opine that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
are necessary for developments, not the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
of the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
personalities of the world like Albert Einstein, Thomas Edison, and
If the term is a proper noun, use initial capitals.
Bill gates
were among school and college dropouts. They brought
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
revolutions in their respective fields without any formal education.

However
, I would say that ratio of such
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
low.
Therefore
, we cannot underestimate the power of formal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
. As it has become one of the mandatory conditions for even job applicants. Take an example
Possible spelling mistake found.
MNCs
engaged in software production, they are more likely to employ candidates
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are degree holders
rather
than those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
have the required
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
no evidence of their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
in terms of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
.
Possible typo: you repeated a whitespace
 
Thus
, firms
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
believe in educated youth to contribute in productive ways to the prosperity of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Education
is the basic needs for a skilled person and it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
unlike that without proper
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
a skilled generation would
automatically
build. There is a huge difference between an electric engineer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
has a
For an academic degree, use "Master’s".
Masters
degree from a reputed university and an electric technician
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
works in a shop. The former one is the type of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nation
needs for development while the later one
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to complete their electric connections and repairing.

Moreover
, it has
been observed
that developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
have a high literacy rate than the developing and under developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
nations
. This
clearly
bears the testimony of the fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
is the reason behind their progress.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, educated populaces do affect the flourishing capabilities of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
Therefore
, it should
be taken
care of.

In a compendium, I would say that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
and prosperity of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
are
closely
correlated to each other.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
20Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay Education is a critical element of the prosperity of any nation. The more educated the people of the country are, more successful their nation becomes. v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
323 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts