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Do you think consumers should avoid over packed products or it is the responsibility of product producers to avoid extra packaging of products? v.1

Do you think consumers should avoid over packed products or it is the responsibility of product producers to avoid extra packaging of products? v. 1
Over-packaging of products has become a trend in today's competitive world. Producers are trying to attract consumers with an attractive packaging of their products, not bothered about its negative impact not only on our environment but the users as well. It should be the responsibility of the producers to limit the wastage of the resources in the form of unnecessary packaging. The cost of over packaging is actually added to the product sold. In fact, at times it is seen the packing cost and durability is more that the product itself. The type of packaging found in pharmaceutical industries can be taken as an example here. Pills and tablets are found to be packed in much bigger and colourful strips than needed. Does this increase the sale of medicine? No. Such packaging is of no concern to the consumers. But, the cost of medicine would have definitely been lesser if sold in a simple outlook. Further, the material used is mostly non-disposable which adds to the environmental pollution to a great extent. Snacks and other food items packaged in eye-catchy shimmering coloured packets are consumed on a large scale by everybody. These packets are really difficult to dispose of as they emit poisonous gas if burnt and if not can be seen to contaminate water somewhere. Producers should realise the importance of using materials like paper and stick to simple packaging. Packaging as seen increases the cost of the product and also makes our environment unhealthy. So, this packaging boom should be checked on a serious note by the producers. Moreover, the producers should be restricted to predefined rules and parameters set by the government. It is also recommended that an awareness among the users that quality of the product is important rather than the attractive packaging.
Over-packaging of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
has become a trend in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's competitive world.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Producers
are trying to attract consumers with an attractive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
packaging
of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
, not bothered about its
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impact not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
on our environment
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the users
as well
. It should be the responsibility of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
producers
to limit the wastage of the resources in the form of unnecessary packaging.

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
of over
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
packaging
is actually
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
added
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
sold. In fact, at times it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
the packing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
and durability is more that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
itself. The type of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
packaging
found in pharmaceutical industries can
be taken
as an example here. Pills and tablets
are found
to
be packed
in much bigger and
Possible spelling mistake. 'colourful' is British English.
colourful
strips than needed. Does this increase the sale of medicine? No. Such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
packaging
is of no concern to the consumers.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
of medicine would have definitely been lesser if sold in a simple outlook.

Further
, the material
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
is
mostly
non-disposable which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
adds
to the environmental pollution to a great extent. Snacks and other food items packaged in eye-catchy shimmering
Possible spelling mistake. 'coloured' is British English.
coloured
packets
are consumed
on a large scale by everybody. These packets are
really
difficult to dispose of as they emit poisonous gas if burnt and if not can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
to contaminate water somewhere.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Producers
should
Possible spelling mistake. 'realise' is British English.
realise
the importance of using materials like paper and stick to simple packaging.

Packaging as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
increases the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
and
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
our environment unhealthy.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
packaging
boom should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
checked
on a serious note by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
producers
.
Moreover
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
producers
should
be restricted
to predefined
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and parameters set by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
. It is
also
recommended that an awareness among the users that quality of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
rather
than the attractive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
packaging
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
21Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes
A foreign language is like a frail, delicate muscle. If you do not use it, it weakens.
Jhumpa Lahiri

IELTS essay Do you think consumers should avoid over packed products or it is the responsibility of product producers to avoid extra packaging of products? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
297 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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