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do you agree or disagreeit is better to have broad education of many academic subjects than to specialize in one specific subject v.1

it is better to have broad education of many academic subjects than to specialize in one specific subject v. 1
Although we are witnessing a significant advancement being made in the field of agriculture, numerous people are still deprived of basic needs like food. In my opinion, the main reason for this issue due to the inflation and the war. This essay will present the solution to be done this problem. On the one hand, the war still occurs in some countries that causes people to suffer from starvation for not being provided food which the world's agriculture is increasing. Besides, the war prevents residents producing local food and difficulty in importing products, which makes people's life more difficult, fearful and even die of famine. Moreover, inflation is also a cause for concern in some countries today. For example, the inflation of Venezuela makes the currency devaluation, so that amount's salary can only buy a kilogram of meat. On the other hand, the United Nations should prevent the conflicts in some countries because when there are not any war, the government can improve the economy and import the foods to provide the people's needs. Besides, the rate of famine in those countries will be declined and the life quality improves also improved a lot. Furthermore, the official should provide the anti-inflationary policies and the job opportunities for the citizens which help them get out of hunger and life becomes more stable. To sum up, the figure of the figure of the hungers will be reduced in the developing industrial world if the inflation and conflict are abolished in some nation by some presented solutions in this essay.
Although we are witnessing a significant advancement
being made
in the field of agriculture, numerous
people
are
still
deprived of basic needs like
food
. In my opinion, the main reason for this issue due to the
inflation
and the
war
. This essay will present the solution to
be done
this problem.

On the one hand, the
war
still
occurs in
some
countries
that causes
people
to suffer from starvation for not
being provided
food
which the world's agriculture is increasing.
Besides
, the
war
prevents
residents producing local
food
and difficulty in importing products, which
makes
people
's life more difficult, fearful and even
die
of famine.
Moreover
,
inflation
is
also
a cause for concern in
some
countries
today
.
For example
, the
inflation
of Venezuela
makes
the currency devaluation,
so
that amount's salary can
only
buy
a kilogram of meat.

On the other hand
, the United Nations should
prevent
the conflicts in
some
countries
because
when there are not any
war
, the
government
can
improve
the economy and import the
foods
to provide the
people
's needs.
Besides
, the rate of famine in those
countries
will
be declined
and the life quality
improves
also
improved
a lot.
Furthermore
, the official should provide the anti-inflationary policies and the job opportunities for the citizens which
help
them
get
out of hunger and life becomes more stable.

To sum up, the figure of the figure of the hungers will be
reduced
in the developing industrial world if the
inflation
and conflict
are abolished
in
some
nation by
some
presented solutions in this essay.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay it is better to have broad education of many academic subjects than to specialize in one specific subject v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
257 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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