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Do you agree or disagree with the statement? The extended family (grandparents, cousins, aunts, and uncles) is less important now than in the past. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v.25

The extended family (grandparents, cousins, aunts, and uncles) is less important now than in the past. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 25
Family, as the fundamental unit of socialization exerts a great importance to the construction of a scociety; however, in recent decades there witnesses transformative changes taking place in every aspect of living, the structure of a typical family endure significant changes. Families accommodating various different generations are gradually replaced by smaller families containing less members. This shift from a complicated to a simple family structure can be explained by changes in lifestyle of modern people, especially the increasing independence of young adults from their parents, and it creates a more favorale living conditions for family members in a more comfortale and convenient manner. A simple family supporting less number of members allows each individual to live freely and happily. Firstly, a common dispute of numerous extended families is about household management owing to the disparity in lifestyles, habits, and preferences of different members of different generations. For example, while young people these days construe staying up late as a common habit, it poses a tremendous problems to elderly who struggle to insomnia, consequently they may be disturbed by other' s activities in the night. Secondly, there is a serious problem to find a general living timetable suitable to every person in a large family for each person has distinctive working skedule. For instance, in Asian family that the mother takes the responsibility for all household chores of a family including preparing supper for all members, choosing an optimum dinner menu accordingly to each person wish or a appropriate time for dinner that every one has arrived at home is a dilemma. As the result, the less complicated family is prefered by increasing number of modern family. Nowadays, young people strive for the life of independece and living apart from their parents is a prevailing trend among them, thus the extended families are no longer preferable among recent generations. Some argue that people should not choose a life of independence from the beginning of their adulthood since they have not properly prepared for separated living, taking both financial and living matter. It is reasonable that a great number of young adults who leave their family in early age cannot attain financial well-being, many sink into debts for they live at subsistence level, and many others commit delinquency due to financial hardship. However, although leaving original family creates tough challenges for young people, it equipped them with necessary skills and determination for future success. Indeed, difficulties and challenges posing in the first steps of independent life provides them with valuable lessons, making them more versatile in dealing with real circumstances and finding resolutions for interpersonal relationships which are the cardinal principle for a sucessful person. In conclusion, simple families encompassing few generations or the absence of young and elderly people in a typical modern family is a rising phenomenon in recent years for the fact that it solves various problems derising from the living of different generations and the desire to get an independent life of young people, indeed, smaller families offer a more comfortable and convenient living for all family members that they can live a life according to their own wishes.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Family
, as the fundamental unit of socialization exerts a great importance to the construction of a
Possible spelling mistake found.
scociety
;
however
, in recent decades there witnesses transformative
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
taking place in every aspect of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
, the structure of a typical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
endure significant
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Families
accommodating various
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
generations are
gradually
replaced by smaller
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
containing
Did you mean "fewer"? The noun members is countable.
less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
members
. This shift from a complicated to a simple
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
structure can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explained
by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in lifestyle of modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
especially
the increasing independence of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
adults from their parents, and it creates a more
Possible spelling mistake found.
favorale
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
conditions for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
members
in a more
Possible spelling mistake found.
comfortale
and convenient manner.

A simple
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
supporting less number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
members
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
each individual to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
freely
and
happily
.
Firstly
, a common dispute of numerous extended
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
is about household management owing to the disparity in lifestyles, habits, and preferences of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
members
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
generations.
For example
, while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
these days construe staying up late as a common habit, it poses a tremendous
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "problem"?
problems
to elderly who struggle to insomnia,
consequently
they may
be disturbed
by
Possible spelling mistake found.
other&
#039; s activities in the night.
Secondly
, there is a serious problem to find a general
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
timetable suitable to every person in a large
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
for each person has distinctive working
Possible spelling mistake found.
skedule
.
For instance
, in Asian
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
that the mother takes the responsibility for all household chores of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
including preparing supper for all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
members
, choosing an optimum dinner menu
accordingly
to each person wish or
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
appropriate time for dinner that every one has arrived at home is a dilemma. As the result, the less complicated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
is
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "preferred", the past tense form of the verb 'prefer'?
prefered
by increasing number of modern family.

Nowadays,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
strive for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
of
Possible spelling mistake found.
independece
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
apart from their parents is a prevailing trend among them,
thus
the extended
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
are no longer preferable among recent generations.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
argue that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should not choose a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
of independence from the beginning of their adulthood since they have not
properly
prepared for separated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
, taking both financial and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
matter. It is reasonable that a great number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
adults who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
in early age cannot attain financial well-being,
Possible agreement error. The noun sink seems to be countable; consider using: "many sinks".
many sink
into debts for they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
at subsistence level, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
others commit delinquency due to financial hardship.
However
, although leaving original
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
creates tough challenges for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, it equipped them with necessary
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and determination for future success.
Indeed
, difficulties and challenges posing in the
first
steps of independent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
provides them with valuable lessons, making them more versatile in dealing with real circumstances and finding resolutions for interpersonal relationships which are the cardinal principle for a
Possible spelling mistake found.
sucessful
person.

In conclusion
, simple
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
encompassing few generations or the absence of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
and elderly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in a typical modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
is a rising phenomenon in recent years for the fact that it solves various problems
Possible spelling mistake found.
derising
from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
generations and the desire to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
an independent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
indeed
, smaller
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
offer a more comfortable and convenient
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
living
for all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
members
that they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
according to their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
wishes.
14Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
56Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13Mistakes

IELTS essay The extended family (grandparents, cousins, aunts, and uncles) is less important now than in the past. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 25

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
521 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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