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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement: It is better to relax by watching a movie or reading a book than doing physical exercise. v.2

: It is better to relax by watching a movie or reading a book than doing physical exercise. v. 2
In today' s modern society, everyone in the city become so busy doing tasks like job, school, and business. Day after day people become more and more stressed, so they need to do something to relax themselves from daily hectic activities. Some people watch movie and read books to relax. Other prefer to do exercise to release from stress. In my concern, doing exercise is the better way to relax. First, doing exercise can make people not only feel relax, but also feel happy, satisfied good appearance and good mood. While doing exercise such as jogging or stretching human body stimulates various brain chemicals that may leave a person feeling happier and more relaxed. A person may also feel better about her appearance and herself when you exercise regularly, which can boost confidence. For instance, according to one research of Biochemistry, study saw that people who exercise twice, are more happier and more positive in attitude rather than those who don' t exercise at all. However, some people have different view point, they feel relaxed while watching movies and reading books. Albeit those kind of activities are entertaining but it give temporary happiness and last for short time. On other hand, doing exercise boost energy, gifted good mood and happiness, and develop positive attitude for life long. Secondly, along with relaxation, doing exercise also provide some good quality of sleep which people hardly get from movie or by reading book. By doing exercise, a person may feel tired but relaxed. From my own experience, when I was in college, I had long vacation about two month. In starting days I was so excited because watching movies and reading books was my favorite time pass and I felt so relaxed. Few weeks later, I could hardly sleep at night and even if when I slept, the endless nightmares woke me up. So my parents took me to our family physician to cure my problem. The physician told me that I carry too much pressure and I needed to be relax and the best way to get relax is doing exercise rather than watching movies or reading books. I started following his instruction. Finally, I could sleep well at night and have the energy to do my work. To sum up, doing exercise not only give happiness and good mood but also provide good quality of sleep and boost energy in human body. So it is perfect way to get relax.
In
Possible spelling mistake found.
today&
#039; s modern society, everyone in the city become
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
busy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doing
tasks like job, school, and business. Day after day
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
become more and more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stressed
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they need to do something to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relax
themselves from daily hectic activities.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movie
and read
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relax
. Other prefer to do
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exercise
to release from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
. In my concern,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
is the better way to relax.

First
,
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doing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
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people
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
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feel
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relax
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
feel
happy, satisfied
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
appearance and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
mood. While
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
such as jogging or stretching human body stimulates various brain chemicals that may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
a person feeling happier and more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relaxed
. A person may
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
feel
better about her appearance and herself when you
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
regularly
, which can boost confidence.
For instance
, according to one research of Biochemistry, study
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
twice, are
Use only "happier" (without 'more') when you use the comparative.
more happier
and more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
in attitude
rather
than those who
Possible spelling mistake found.
don&
#039; t
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exercise
at all.
However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
view point, they
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feel
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relaxed
while watching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
. Albeit
Did you mean "this kind" or "those kinds"?
those kind
of activities are entertaining
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it
Did you mean "gives"?
give
temporary happiness and last for short time. On other hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
boost energy, gifted
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
mood and happiness, and develop
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
attitude for life long.

Secondly
, along with relaxation,
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doing
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exercise
also
provide
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
quality of
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sleep
which
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people
hardly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movie
or by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
book
. By
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
, a person may
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
feel
tired
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relaxed
. From my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
experience, when I was in college, I had long vacation about two
Possible agreement error. The noun 'month' seems to be countable, so consider using: "months".
month
. In starting days I was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
excited
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
watching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
was my favorite time pass and I felt
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relaxed
. Few weeks later, I could hardly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sleep
at night and even if when I slept, the endless nightmares woke me up.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
my parents took me to our family physician to cure my problem. The physician
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
told
me that I carry too much pressure and I needed to be
Consider using a past participle here: "relaxed".
relax
and the best way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relax
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
rather
than watching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reading
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
books
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
following his instruction.
Finally
, I could
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sleep
well at night and have the energy to do my work.

To sum up,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exercise
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
give happiness and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
mood
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
quality of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sleep
and boost energy in human body.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
it is
Please check whether an article is missing: "a perfect".
perfect
way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relax
.
13Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
66Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay : It is better to relax by watching a movie or reading a book than doing physical exercise. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
409 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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