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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? The food your parents ate growing up is healthier than the food eaten now. Provide specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v.623

The food your parents ate growing up is healthier than the food eaten now. Provide specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 623
Health is extremely crucial in every individual' s life. Being healthy depends on many factors, among which is healthy food to keep humans free from various diseases. Food that we consume in the present days and food that our parents ate in earlier days have a huge difference. As far as I am concerned I agree with the notion that our parents ate healthier food than us. This position is based on three main reasons that will be analyzed in the following passages. To begin with, most of the foods that our parents consumed are organic and not chemically treated. Due to advances in food marketing, huge competition exists among those food companies, therefore, it is very common to find chemically injected vegetables and fruits in supermarkets those days. Since these are much cheaper and easily accessible. On the other hand, most vegetables and fruits in the past days during our parents were all organic and pure which are much healthier and also cost-effective, unlike present days. For instance, when my parents visited for the first time in New York, they were shocked by the size of apples, and also because of its radiant bright waxy red color. Soon we bought those apples home and to my shock, my parents could feel the weird bitter taste in those apples soon I explained the reasons may be because of chemicals. Secondly, canned and processed foods are available everywhere and those are even cheaper than normal raw ingredients. despite its unhealthiness, people these days prefer to eat those as they are easy and take lesser time to prepare. Such harmful canned and processed foods are not mundane in older days. Furthermore, during the older days, fast food restaurants and vendors were not so common as it is now. Present days, fast food stalls are found at every corner of the street and most of today' s generations are more tempted to eat fast food rather than cooking meals at home. My life is a compelling example of this. I rarely cook food at home. I eat burgers or pizzas for lunch every day at my workplace. I have noticed certain weight gain ever since I have started eating from outside. This example demonstrates how unhealthy food is readily available at our doorsteps and due to this, our health is deteriorating at a greater frequency. Consequently, foods that or parents ate were much healthier. In summation, I am of the opinion that our parents ate healthier food because of more availability of organic and pure foods, lesser canned and processed foods in market and also because of lesser fast-food restaurants and vendors.
Health is
extremely
crucial in every
Possible spelling mistake found.
individual&
#039; s life. Being healthy depends on
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
factors, among which is healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
humans free from various diseases.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Food
that we consume in the present days and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
that our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ate
in earlier days have a huge difference.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
far as I
am concerned
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the notion that our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ate
healthier
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
than us. This position
is based
on three main reasons that will
be analyzed
in the following passages.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
that our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
consumed are organic and not
chemically
treated.

Due to advances in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
marketing, huge competition exists among those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
,
therefore
, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
common to find
chemically
injected vegetables and fruits in supermarkets those days. Since these are much cheaper and
easily
accessible.
On the other hand
, most vegetables and fruits in the past days during our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
were all organic and pure which are much healthier and
also
cost-effective, unlike present days.
For instance
, when my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
visited for the
first
time in New York, they
were shocked
by the size of apples, and
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of its radiant bright waxy red color.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Soon
we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
those apples home and to my shock, my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
could feel the weird bitter taste in those apples
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explained
the reasons may be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of chemicals.

Secondly
, canned and processed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
are available everywhere and those are even cheaper than normal raw ingredients.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
despite
its unhealthiness,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
these days prefer to eat those as they are easy and take lesser time to prepare. Such harmful canned and processed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
are not mundane in older days.

Furthermore
, during the older days,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
restaurants and vendors were not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
common as it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
. Present days,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
stalls
are found
at every corner of the street and most of
Possible spelling mistake found.
today&
#039; s generations are more tempted to eat
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
rather
than cooking meals at home. My life is a compelling example of this. I rarely cook
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
at home. I eat burgers or pizzas for lunch every day at my workplace.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
have noticed certain weight gain ever since I have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
eating from outside. This example demonstrates how unhealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
is
readily
available at our doorsteps and due to this, our health is deteriorating at a greater frequency.
Consequently
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
that or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ate
were much healthier.

In summation, I am of the opinion that our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ate
healthier
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of more availability of organic and pure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
, lesser canned and processed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
in market and
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of lesser
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
-food restaurants and vendors.
13Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
30Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes

IELTS essay The food your parents ate growing up is healthier than the food eaten now. Provide specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 623

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
439 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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