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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Cars have made a greater impact on society than airplanesUse specific reasons and examples to support your opinion v.386

Cars have made a greater impact on society than airplanesUse specific reasons and examples to support your opinion v. 386
Throughout time people have humanized our pets, and some believe that nowadays they even have more rights than humans. While others believe, that animals should be treated as such. I think, that animals should be treated with care, and respect, but we must never forget that we are not dealing with an actual person, but an irrational being instead. In order to give the same human rights to every creature, that would be very costly for the government economic system. Despite, the amount of love one person has for its own pet, it should be kept in mind that they do not need the amount of care some people believe they do. For example, I do not think that dogs need to wear boots, when they go outside for a walk, and horses do not need to wear specific raincoats for rainy days. On the other hand, there are those people that are completely immune to animal suffering, and have no problem of what happens to them when they are used for scientific experiments. For instance, China does not sell one single cosmetic product that has not been previously tested on animals. Usually, they test them on rabbits or mice, but some are even tested on monkeys, dogs, cats, and even pigs. Not to mention, all the sorts of animal abuse that happens inside the slaughterhouse, in order to provide constant fresh meat, containing all sorts of chemicals and hormones. In conclusion, I believe that neither side is correct, and that the answer to the appropriate way to treat our four-legged friends is somewhere in between. Therefore, we do not need to be overprotective our dogs and cats, and give them more attention that we would give a relative of ours in a similar situation. Also, it is my belief that a great number of creatures are being mistreated by the pharmaceutical companies, where they are used to test all different types of products.
Throughout time
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
have humanized our pets, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that nowadays they even have more rights than humans. While others
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
, that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
should
be treated
as such. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
, that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
should
be treated
with care, and respect,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
never forget that we are not dealing with an actual person,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
an irrational being
instead
.

In order to give the same human rights to every creature, that would be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
costly for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
economic system. Despite, the amount of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
one person has for its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
pet, it should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
in mind that they do not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
the amount of care
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
they do.
For example
, I do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that dogs
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to wear boots, when they go outside for a walk, and horses do not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to wear specific raincoats for rainy days.

On the other hand
, there are those
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
that are completely immune to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animal
suffering, and have no problem of what happens to them when they are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for scientific experiments.
For instance
, China does not sell one single cosmetic product that has not been previously
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tested
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
.
Usually
, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
test
them on rabbits or mice,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
are even
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tested
on monkeys, dogs, cats, and even pigs. Not to mention, all the sorts of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animal
abuse that happens inside the slaughterhouse, in order to provide constant fresh meat, containing all sorts of chemicals and hormones.

In conclusion
, I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that neither side is correct, and that the answer to the appropriate way to treat our four-legged friends is somewhere in between.
Therefore
, we do not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to be overprotective our dogs and cats, and give them more attention that we would give a relative of ours in a similar situation.
Also
, it is my belief that a great number of creatures are
being mistreated
by the pharmaceutical
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
, where they are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
test
all
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
types of products.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Cars have made a greater impact on society than airplanesUse specific reasons and examples to support your opinion v. 386

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
324 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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