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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Parents or other adult relatives should make important decisions for their older (15 to 18year-old) teenage children. Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion. v.290

Parents or other adult relatives should make important decisions for their older (15 to 18year-old) teenage children. Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion. v. 290
Consumers of technology enabled devices say that since they can now watch movies on their tablets or phones, there is little reason left to go to a cinema. Other people argue that films should be seen on the big screen to be completely enjoyed. In my opinion, movie goers' personal preference dictates whether to watch movies in a theatre or not. Watching a film on a technology enabled device provides the flexibility which a theatre does not provide. Users can play, pause or altogether watch the film again on their devices. In addition, users have the flexibility of watching movies on their beds in a relaxed environment without worrying about dressing up or showing up on time. This has led to widespread usage of mobile devices for consumption of films and entertainment. The recent announcement of reaching one million subscribers, in a small span of 3 years, by the entertainment streaming service Netflix is an example of mobile devices gaining preference in comparison to cinemas. Going to the cinema is often enjoyed as it provides a fulfilling experience to most individuals. In many cases, they go out with their families, friends or dates and buy various eatables, available near the theatres, to enjoy the day. This experience is unique to movie theatres and cannot be found in homes, where most of the mobile device users see movies. For example, a respondent in a recent survey of cinemas was quoted as saying 'the smell of fresh popcorn and perfume can never be replaced by lazy film watching at home'. Therefore, cinemas offer a wholesome experience which cannot be found while watching movies on devices. In conclusion, both the views have their own merits and demerits. Hence, in my opinion, it is a matter of personal preference and mood if someone wants to watch a movie at home on a screen, or by going out to a cinema.
Consumers of technology enabled
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
devices
say that since they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
watch
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
on their tablets or phones, there is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
reason
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
to go to a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cinema
. Other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
argue that films should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
on the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
screen to be completely enjoyed. In my opinion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movie
goers' personal preference dictates whether to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
watch
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
in a
Possible spelling mistake. 'theatre' is British English.
theatre
or not.

Watching a film on a technology enabled
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
device
provides the flexibility which a
Possible spelling mistake. 'theatre' is British English.
theatre
does not provide. Users can play, pause or altogether
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
watch
the film again on their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
devices
.
In addition
, users have the flexibility of watching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
on their beds in a relaxed environment without worrying about dressing up or showing up on time. This has led to widespread usage of mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
devices
for consumption of films and entertainment. The recent announcement of reaching one million subscribers, in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
span of 3 years, by the entertainment streaming service Netflix is an example of mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
devices
gaining preference
in comparison
to cinemas.

Going to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cinema
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
enjoyed as it provides a fulfilling experience to most individuals. In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
cases, they go out with their families, friends or dates and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
various eatables, available near the
Possible spelling mistake. 'theatres' is British English.
theatres
, to enjoy the day. This experience is unique to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movie
Possible spelling mistake. 'theatres' is British English.
theatres
and cannot
be found
in homes, where most of the mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
device
users
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
.
For example
, a respondent in a recent survey of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cinemas
was quoted
as saying 'the smell of fresh popcorn and perfume can never
be replaced
by lazy film watching at home'.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cinemas
offer a wholesome experience which cannot
be found
while watching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movies
on devices.

In conclusion
, both the views have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
merits and demerits.
Hence
, in my opinion, it is a matter of personal preference and mood if someone wants to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
watch
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
movie
at home on a screen, or by going out to a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cinema
.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Parents or other adult relatives should make important decisions for their older (15 to 18year-old) teenage children. Use specific reasons and examples to support your opinion. v. 290

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
316 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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