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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? You can learn a lot about people by the clothes they wear. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v.27

You can learn a lot about people by the clothes they wear. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 27
It is a fact that the majority of people die due to traffic accidents. This is because they don’t obey the highway rules and governments should change the penalty regulations. Discussing the reasons, the most common one is that drivers often do not observe the traffic rules which is determined by the responsible institutions. This is because they believe that they are in a hurry and although the speed limit is written on the signpost they exceed that, which results in painful deaths by crashing another motor or person because they can not control the vehicle correctly. Moreover, they do not stop on the red light, which means they have to wait until the green. As an evidence, a report has been published by a group of PhD students at the University of Essex regarding this issue indicating that people who break the traffic rules are more likely to die in a road accident than observers. A solution to this worrying problem is that the law related to this issue should be updated. More specifically, most of the drivers who violate the rules tend to commit the same crime again since rules are lax and they can afford the fine. Therefore, governments should modify the punishment system by increasing the fine to encourage drivers driving more carefully. For instance, the UK has a strict traffic policy which contributes a great deal number of people to observe that. In contrast, drivers in India do not follow the authorities’ decisions as penalties are not a disincentive. In conclusion, traffic accidents are leading to an increasing number of dead people because of breaking the rules. To solve this problem, administrators of the countries should modify the law firmly.
It is a fact that the majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
die
due to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
accidents. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they don’t obey the highway
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rules
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
the penalty regulations.

Discussing the reasons, the most common one is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drivers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
do not observe the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rules
which
is determined
by the responsible institutions. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they believe that they are in a hurry and although the speed limit
is written
on the signpost they exceed that, which results in painful deaths by crashing another motor or person
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they can not control the vehicle
correctly
.
Moreover
, they do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
on the red light, which means they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
wait until the green. As an evidence, a report has
been published
by a group of PhD students at the University of Essex regarding this issue indicating that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who break the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rules
are more likely to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
die
in a road accident than observers.

A solution to this worrying problem is that the law related to this issue should
be updated
. More
specifically
, most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drivers
who violate the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rules
tend to commit the same crime again since
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rules
are
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
lax and
they can afford the fine.
Therefore
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
should modify the punishment system by increasing the fine to encourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drivers
driving more
carefully
.
For instance
, the UK has a strict
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
policy which contributes a great deal number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to observe that.
In contrast
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drivers
in India do not follow the authorities’ decisions as penalties are not a disincentive.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
accidents are leading to an increasing number of dead
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of breaking the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rules
. To solve this problem, administrators of the countries should modify the law
firmly
.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
19Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
Language is the blood of the soul into which thoughts run and out of which they grow.
Oliver Wendell Holmes

IELTS essay You can learn a lot about people by the clothes they wear. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 27

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
285 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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