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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement. Students learn better when they are not threatened with possible failure. Use reasons and specific examples to support your opinion. v.217

Students learn better when they are not threatened with possible failure. Use reasons and specific examples to support your opinion. v. 217
Pursuing graduation or post graduation from foreign institutes is gaining popularity amongst students. This essay would suggest that better quality of education and meeting people from different culture are the major advantages of studying abroad while its expensive nature and the cultural shock, that a few students may experience, are the possible cons of studying in another country. The kind of education these foreign universities provide are of the highest quality. The students are encouraged to participate in the immense research work these institutes undertake thus helping the students to gain deep understanding of the subjects. In a recent report by IIT Mumbai, 60% of the student placed in reputed firms said that research assignments played an important part in their curriculum. Also, these students get an opportunity to meet and work with fellow students from different nationalities, thus helping them to improve their interpersonal skills. On the other hand, pursuing tertiary schooling from different country may prove to be too expensive. Students may not be financially strong to cope with the cost which includes tuition fees, accommodation fees, cost of foods, clothes, transportation etc. In a recent survey conducted by the University of Mumbai revealed that 40% of their students work in part-time jobs to fund their studies. Also, pupils may suffer from the cultural shock as these students may not be able to quickly adjust to the foreign environment. According to the Immigration Center of Canada, 30% of the students enrolled during winter session opt out within 7 weeks from their arrival in the country. In conclusion, studying abroad is advantageous as it provides the student an opportunity to access good quality education and develop interpersonal skills by meeting people from different ethnic group. However, high cost factor and inability to blend in foreign environment are its biggest drawbacks.
Pursuing graduation or post graduation from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
institutes is gaining popularity amongst
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
. This essay would suggest that better quality of education and meeting
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
culture are the major advantages of studying abroad while its expensive nature and the cultural shock, that a few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
may experience, are the possible cons of studying in another country.

The kind of education these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
universities provide are of the highest quality. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are encouraged
to participate in the immense research work these institutes undertake
thus
helping the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to gain deep understanding of the subjects. In a recent report by IIT Mumbai, 60% of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
placed in reputed firms said that research assignments played an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
part in their curriculum.
Also
, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
an opportunity to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
and work with fellow
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
nationalities,
thus
helping them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their interpersonal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.

On the other hand
, pursuing tertiary schooling from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
country may prove to be too expensive.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Students
may not be
financially
strong to cope with the cost which includes tuition fees, accommodation fees, cost of foods, clothes, transportation etc. In a recent survey conducted by the University of Mumbai revealed that 40% of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
work in part-time jobs to fund their studies.
Also
, pupils may suffer from the cultural shock as these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
may not be able to
quickly
adjust to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
environment. According to the Immigration Center of Canada, 30% of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
enrolled during winter session opt out within 7 weeks from their arrival in the country.

In conclusion
, studying abroad is advantageous as it provides the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
an opportunity to access
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
quality education and develop interpersonal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
by meeting
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
ethnic group.
However
, high cost factor and inability to blend in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreign
environment are its biggest drawbacks.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
Language is not a genetic gift, it is a social gift. Learning a new language is becoming a member of the club – the community of speakers of that language.
Frank Smith

IELTS essay Students learn better when they are not threatened with possible failure. Use reasons and specific examples to support your opinion. v. 217

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
301 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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