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Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Boys and girls should attend separate schools. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v.117

Boys and girls should attend separate schools. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 117
Through the development of technology, people`s methods for purchasing have changed, and now online shops play a vital role in how people buy their items. Yet, in the past, people used to shop from in-store ones. In my opinion, however, it is not a positive development, and its drawbacks are outweighed. Online stores use more and more due to the advent of technology. Firstly, although these modern shops help people to save extra time, people could not make sure whether the quality of tools is at a high level or not as a result of they cannot see what they buy in a person. Moreover, they cannot Peru their clothes. To illustrate, if one buys their dress from the Internet, the size, color, and shape may not fit them, so the articles, which were bought, could not be changed. Also, even sometimes, some online stores are a fraud, and their real products have far differences from what are they indicate on their web. On the other hand, in the past, people used to go out for shopping with their friends or family members, generally with whom they feel comfortable, which it improves their cheers and happiness and this communication prevents mental problems to occur. Also, isolation has reduced throughout their shopping and the depression, that people may face decreases due to the socializing with others. Thus, over-reliance on technology and the Internet are the causes of mental problems which we have not sufficient awareness about. In conclusion, despite the various aids of the online shop, in my perspective, the negative impacts are stronger due to the lack of awareness about the products and decrease in a face to face conversation.
Through the development of technology,
people`s
methods for purchasing have
changed
, and
now
online
shops
play a vital role in how
people
buy
their items.
Yet
, in the past,
people
used
to
shop
from in-store ones. In my opinion,
however
, it is not a
positive
development, and its drawbacks
are outweighed
.

Online stores
use
more and more due to the advent of technology.
Firstly
, although these modern
shops
help
people
to save extra time,
people
could not
make
sure whether the quality of tools is at a high level or not
as a result
of they cannot
see
what they
buy
in a person.
Moreover
, they cannot Peru their clothes. To illustrate, if one
buys
their dress from the Internet, the size, color, and shape may not fit them,
so
the articles, which were
bought
, could not be
changed
.
Also
, even
sometimes
,
some
online stores are a fraud, and their real products have far differences from what are they indicate on their web.

On the other hand
, in the past,
people
used
to go out for shopping with their friends or family members,
generally
with whom they feel comfortable, which it
improves
their cheers and happiness and this communication
prevents
mental problems to occur.
Also
, isolation has
reduced
throughout their shopping and the depression, that
people
may face decreases due to the socializing with others.
Thus
, over-reliance on technology and the Internet are the causes of mental problems which we have not sufficient awareness about.

In conclusion
, despite the various aids of the online
shop
, in my perspective, the
negative
impacts are stronger due to the lack of awareness about the products and decrease in a face to face conversation.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Boys and girls should attend separate schools. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 117

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
280 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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