Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Do you agree or disagree It is more important for governments to spend money to improve internet access than to public transportation v.2

It is more important for governments to spend money to improve internet access than to public transportation v. 2
Always it has been a controversial debate that how to allocate budget to different purposes in the governments. some people think that the improvement of the internet access is more essential than public transportation, however, in my opinion, it' s better for a society to have improved public transportation than internet access. I feel this way because of some reasons that I will explore in the following assay: First of all, as all we know the improved public transportation has many positive impacts on every people' s life. one of that impact is that people could save more time because when governments spend more money to build more bus or train stations around the city, people would have more easy access to them in a short time and consequently, they have more time to do their tasks, hence their output would be increased a lot and also their satisfaction of their life would be increased too. In addition, with improved public transportation, people would be encouraged to use them more instead of their cars and as a a result, the traffic would be decreased. my personal experience is a compelling evidence of this. since last year I went to my workplace by my car and because of the high traffic jam, I had to wake up very soon in the mornings. I could not use public transportation, because there was not any station near my house. But fortunately, 10 months ago a bus station was built near to my house with very fast and equipped buses and now I can use them. it has many positive impacts on my life and also other people, further than declined traffic in our area, it is not necessary for me to wake up very soon in the mornings and now I feel better and less tired. Moreover, it is very clear for everyone that today we are faced with environmental issues around the world and we have to try more for its improvement. when people have an easy access to public transportation the amount of released CO2 to the atmosphere will be decreased a lot and consequently, it could help the situation of our planet. In conclusion, I am of the opinion that, it' s better to spend more money on the improvement of public transportation because it has more positive impact on our life. it could help us to save more time and on the other hand, the traffic jam would be decreased a lot and the other significant direct impact is the reduction of air pollution which should be considered a lot.
The adverb 'Always' is usually not used at the beginning of a sentence.
Always
it has been a controversial debate that how to allocate budget to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
purposes in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that the improvement of the internet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
access
is more essential than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
,
however
, in my opinion,
Possible spelling mistake found.
it&
#039; s better for a society to have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
than internet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
access
. I feel this way
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
reasons that I will explore in the following assay:

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, as all we know the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
impacts
on every
Possible spelling mistake found.
people&
#039; s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
one
of that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
impact
is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
could save more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
when
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
spend more money to build more bus or train stations around the city,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
would have more easy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
access
to them in a short
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and
consequently
, they have more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to do their tasks,
hence
their output would
be increased
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
and
also
their satisfaction of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
would
be increased
too.

In addition
, with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
would
be encouraged
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
them more
instead
of their cars and as
Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only "a" or "a" is left.
a a
result, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
would
be decreased
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
my
personal experience is a compelling evidence of this.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
since
last year I went to my workplace by my car and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
jam, I had to wake up
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
in the mornings. I could not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
there was not any station near my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
fortunately
, 10 months ago a bus station
was built
near to my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
and equipped buses and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
I can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
them.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
it
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
impacts
on my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and
also
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
further
than declined
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
in our area, it is not necessary for me to wake up
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
in the mornings and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
I feel better and less tired.

Moreover
, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
for everyone that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
we
are faced
with environmental issues around the
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
world and
we
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
try more for its improvement.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have an easy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
access
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
the amount of released CO2 to the atmosphere will
be decreased
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
and
consequently
, it could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
the situation of our planet.

In conclusion
, I am of the opinion that,
Possible spelling mistake found.
it&
#039; s better to spend more money on the improvement of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it has more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
impact
on our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
it
could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us to save more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and
on the other hand
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
jam would
be decreased
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
and the other significant direct
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
impact
is the reduction of air pollution which should
be considered
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
.
13Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
46Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
15Mistakes

IELTS essay It is more important for governments to spend money to improve internet access than to public transportation v. 2

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
431 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts