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Do you agree or disagree? The best way to improve the quality of education in a country is to increase the teachers’ salaries. v.97

The best way to improve the quality of education in a country is to increase the teachers’ salaries. v. 97
The question is whether an increase in teachers' salaries can lead a country to optimize the quality of its education system or not. Everyone in consideration to his private view point can maintain a specific direction toward this statement; however, I am inclined to declare that the proposed idea will not be the best decision for improving of this section. I feel this in some ways, which I will explore them in following essay for strengthening my vantage point: To begin with, nobody could overlook the role of teachers and professors in a society since they are prosperous humans; hence, this strata is deserved of respect; however, one should not forget that nowadays the technology has improved and also it has kept marching forward. Such a technology-driven world, students access to the newest electronic devices and the fast speed of internet. It goes without saying that a wide range of data is available for students; consequently, the young will be able to obtain the most up-dated information through a variety of resources. My opinion may seem a bit of ambitiously but whether we want or not, our teachers could have gained their knowledge by those same mentioned data above which were written in the books. Even more, today’s new discoveries have challenged the old theories and matters; as a result, the overwhelming majority of teachers tries to instruct in the same old route. Nevertheless, an increment in the income cannot be a rational reason for boosting the teachers' performance. The second reason why I refute with this view lies the fact that if government determines a reasonable number of money for other aspects of education, it will be more effective. For instance, a professional management can spend this budget for providing the newest published books and the most comfort chairs and tables for library, buying the most equipped tools for the laboratory, creating a sport salon for enhancing mental and physical activity in students and giving scholarship to the most creative project and you name it. One should notice, the teaching is just a part of education story and other parts depend on the students' own efforts. Moreover, there is a bit of different point here. This reward or salary may motivate some teachers to work hard; however, I believe that in such a circumstance, teachers prefer to spend their time on clever students instead of ordinary students; subsequently, this condition can create a biased atmosphere in the class. As I have illustrated, I strongly disagree with this suggestion because our education system requires a big attention in other dimensions such as providing the best conditions and educational tools for students instead of enhancing teachers' income.
The question is whether an increase in
teachers&
#039; salaries can lead a country to optimize the quality of its
education
system or not. Everyone in consideration to his private view point can maintain a specific direction toward this statement;
however
, I
am inclined
to declare that the proposed
idea
will not be the best decision for improving of this section. I feel this in
some
ways, which I will explore them in following essay for strengthening my vantage point:

To
begin
with, nobody could overlook the role of
teachers
and professors in a society since they are prosperous humans;
hence
,
this
strata
is deserved
of respect;
however
, one should not forget that nowadays the technology has
improved
and
also
it has
kept
marching forward. Such a technology-driven world,
students
access to the newest electronic devices and the
fast
speed of internet. It goes without saying that a wide range of data is available for
students
;
consequently
, the young will be able to obtain the most up-dated information through a variety of resources. My opinion may seem a bit of
ambitiously
but
whether we want or not, our
teachers
could have gained their knowledge by those same mentioned data above which
were written
in the books. Even more,
today
’s new discoveries have challenged the
old
theories and matters;
as a result
, the overwhelming majority of
teachers
tries to instruct in the same
old
route.
Nevertheless
, an increment in the income cannot be a rational reason for boosting the
teachers&
#039; performance.

The second reason why I refute with this view lies the fact that if
government
determines a reasonable number of money for other aspects of
education
, it will be more effective.
For instance
, a professional management can spend this budget for providing the newest published books and the most comfort chairs and tables for library, buying the most equipped tools for the laboratory, creating a sport salon for enhancing mental and physical activity in
students
and giving scholarship to the most creative project and you name it. One should notice, the teaching is
just
a part of
education
story and other parts depend on the
students&
#039;
own
efforts.

Moreover
, there is a bit of
different
point here. This reward or salary may motivate
some
teachers
to work
hard
;
however
, I believe that in such a circumstance,
teachers
prefer to spend their time on clever
students
instead
of ordinary
students
;
subsequently
, this condition can create a biased atmosphere in the
class
.

As I have illustrated, I
strongly
disagree with this suggestion
because
our
education
system requires a
big
attention in other dimensions such as providing the best conditions and educational tools for
students
instead
of enhancing
teachers&
#039; income.
13Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
19Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes
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IELTS essay The best way to improve the quality of education in a country is to increase the teachers’ salaries. v. 97

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
446 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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