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Do you agree or disagree? Media are less concerned about the accuracy of news in compared with the past. v.131

Media are less concerned about the accuracy of news in compared with the past. v. 131
The question is whether Media are less concerned about the accuracy of news in compared with the past or not. Everyone with regard to his perspective may maintain a specific direction toward this statement. Some believe that TV, Radio or internet are not reliable and sometimes they can deceive human beings with wrong news while others have a conviction that media acts more precise than past and the correlation staff know that any error in news can create destructive consequences. I am unanimous with the latter group; so the next paragraphs will vastly elucidate my vantage point through two salient reasons: To begin with, nobody could overlook this fact that today' s technology has kept marching forward and it has provided the condition for people to access to up-dated news as soon as possible. There are plentiful of tools such as satellites, high-speed internet, computers and cell-phones and so on which assist community in achieving the mentioned goal. In the past eras, unpleasant events like earthquakes, floods or avalanches could have not been reported quickly because there were not enough devices for notifying; hence, a large number of people lost their live until rescue forces arrived. Yet, nowadays, since communities are able to receive the news fast and without flaws; therefore, the equipped helicopters or vehicles with the newest medical facilities can be sent to destroyed areas. It can be said that the average of death or injury will be reduced in this way. In addition, the economics of every country depends on the global price of oil, gold, dollar and euro and list goes on. Businessmen, traders and investors need to be aware of any change in global marketing. It goes without saying that a society will develop only when its different types of industries prosper in financial fields. If a businessman does not know the last price of gold or oil in world, their investment may fail and consequently this occurrence will have negative impacts on the country' s economics, so the governments must warn media about the validity of news. Meanwhile, political issues such as war, producing nuclear energy and or politic deductions require a high level of accuracy. A mistake or inaccuracy in expressing news may mislead the leaders or armies of other countries and it will cause the war to be started among the world. To sum up, this conclusion could be drawn that today' s TV, Radio or internet emphasize that news should be reported fast with high accuracy because any mistake may lead the country toward irrecoverable damages such as financial fails or increasing of death.
The question is whether Media are less concerned about the accuracy of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
in compared with the past or not. Everyone with regard to his perspective may maintain a specific direction toward this statement.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
believe that TV, Radio or internet are not reliable and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
they can deceive human beings with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
while others have a conviction that media acts more precise than past and the correlation staff know that any error in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
can create destructive consequences. I am unanimous with the latter group;
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
the
next
paragraphs will
vastly
elucidate my vantage point through two salient reasons:

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, nobody could overlook this fact that
Possible spelling mistake found.
today&
#039; s technology has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
marching forward and it has provided the condition for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to access to up-dated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
as possible. There are plentiful of tools such as satellites, high-speed internet, computers and cell-phones and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on which assist community in achieving the mentioned goal. In the past eras, unpleasant
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
events
like earthquakes, floods or avalanches could have not
been reported
quickly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
there were not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
devices for notifying;
hence
,
Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use "many" or "numerous"
a large number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
lost their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
until rescue forces arrived.
Yet
, nowadays, since communities are able to receive the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
and without flaws;
therefore
, the equipped helicopters or vehicles with the newest medical facilities can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sent
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroyed
areas. It can
be said
that the average of death or injury will be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
in this way.

In addition
, the economics of every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
depends on the global price of oil, gold, dollar and euro and list goes on. Businessmen, traders and investors need to be aware of any
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in global marketing. It goes without saying that a society will develop
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
when its
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
types of industries prosper in financial fields. If a businessman does not know the last price of gold or oil in world, their investment may fail and
consequently
this occurrence will have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impacts on the
Possible spelling mistake found.
country&
#039; s economics,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
warn media about the validity of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
. Meanwhile, political issues such as war, producing nuclear energy and or politic deductions require a high level of accuracy. A mistake or inaccuracy in expressing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
may mislead the leaders or armies of other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
and it will cause the war to be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
among the world.

To sum up, this conclusion could
be drawn
that
Possible spelling mistake found.
today&
#039; s TV, Radio or internet emphasize that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
should
be reported
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
with high accuracy
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
any mistake may lead the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
toward irrecoverable damages such as financial fails or increasing of death.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
12Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay Media are less concerned about the accuracy of news in compared with the past. v. 131

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
433 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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