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do you agree or disagree? people can solve important problems by themselves or by their families without referring to the government. v.102

people can solve important problems by themselves or by their families without referring to the government. v. 102
The question is whether people can solve important problems by themselves or by their families without referring to the government or not. Everyone with regard to his private viewpoint can maintain a specific direction toward this statement; however I am inclined to affirm that referring to the government for any small problem is unnecessary. My arguments and reasons are listed below which will strengthen my vantage point: To begin with, it is axiomatic that every family wrestles with a lot of troubles in life; hence they look for finding the perfect solutions. When a family confronts with a problem, since the members of family know each other well and also they are aware from condition of their life; consequently the best choice will be opted without wasting any time. The second reason why I advocate to people not to refer to the government lies in the fact the cohesion. Inasmuch people usually approach toward each other in hardship time; subsequently there is a chance for the members of family to gather and participate in family sessions for removing the problems. One should not forget that such a problematic circumstance can reinforce the cooperation and participation feeling in a family. It goes without saying that children of these types of families will have a bright future in compared with other children, because they have learned to consult for solving their problems earlier. Moreover, there is a bit of different point here. Some problems are not related with the government. Take for instance, being anti-social of children. In these cases the families should try to solve the problems with regard to their personal experiences and also with aid of experts. By taking all above mention arguments this conclusion could be drawn that solving the problems inside the families can provide an advantageous bed. Such families will be able to increase cohesion soul among themselves and also this habit can have a positive effect on their children' s future.
The question is whether
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can solve
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
by themselves or by their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
without referring to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
or not. Everyone with regard to his private viewpoint can maintain a specific direction toward this statement;
however
I
am inclined
to affirm that referring to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
for any
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
is unnecessary. My arguments and reasons
are listed
below which will strengthen my vantage point:

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, it is axiomatic that every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
wrestles with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
troubles in life;
hence
they look for finding the perfect solutions. When a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
confronts with a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
, since the members of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
know each other well and
also
they are aware from condition of their life;
consequently
the best choice will
be opted
without wasting any time.

The second reason why I advocate to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
not to refer to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
lies in the fact the cohesion. Inasmuch
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
usually
approach toward each other in hardship time;
subsequently
there is a chance for the members of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
to gather and participate in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
sessions for removing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
. One should not forget that such a problematic circumstance can reinforce the cooperation and participation feeling in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
. It goes without saying that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
of these types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
will have a bright future in compared with other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they have learned to consult for solving their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
earlier.

Moreover
, there is a bit of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
point here.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
are not related with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
. Take
for instance
, being anti-social of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. In these cases the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
should try to solve the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
with regard to their personal experiences and
also
with aid of experts.

By taking all above mention arguments this conclusion could
be drawn
that solving the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
inside the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
can provide an advantageous bed. Such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
will be able to increase cohesion soul among themselves and
also
this habit can have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
effect on their
Possible spelling mistake found.
children&
#039; s future.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
27Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
The most intimate temper of a people, its deepest soul, is above all in its language.
Jules Michelet

IELTS essay people can solve important problems by themselves or by their families without referring to the government. v. 102

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
326 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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