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Discuss the benefits and drawbacks of pet ownership for animals and for the community as a whole v.1

Discuss the benefits and drawbacks of pet ownership for animals and for the community as a whole v. 1
Productivity place a significant role in every organisation. Some people ponder that to motivate employees employers should pay them on the basis of their output and sales. I partially agree with this statement because I think that, undoubtedly this method is beneficial for encouraging employees, but there are some other methods are also available to inspire worker. Doubtless, paying as per completion of target is a good method to encourage employees to work harder. Is the way to earn more than a fixed salary payment. When people earn more incentive as per their output, sales they will get more inspired to earn more. For instance, when a worker earns handsome earning in a month only because of his/her hard work he/she will definitely get more encouragement to earn more extra in the future. On the other hand, there are some other ways are also available to inspire workers to work harder. Firstly, the company can arrange employees welfare facilities such as free medical treatment, free education for their children, cost free accomodation et cetera. These facilities could help to influence workers for assiduous. Additionally, company's top management can promote their extraordinary workers as a reward for their mind blowing performance. This job promotion, can definitely boost their performance for future. To conclude, every employee of a company wants job satisfaction with high wages. No doubt is better to reward them as per their output nevertheless, other ways, such as employee welfare schemes are also playing well to push them to work hard.
Productivity
Consider using third-person verb forms for singular and mass nouns: "places".
place
a significant role in every
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisation' is British English.
organisation
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
ponder that to motivate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
employers should pay them on the basis of their output and sales. I
partially
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this statement
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that,
undoubtedly
this method is beneficial for encouraging
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
methods are
also
available to inspire worker.

Doubtless, paying as per completion of target is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
method to encourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
harder. Is the way to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earn
more than a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
salary payment. When
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earn
more incentive as per their output, sales they will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
more inspired to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earn
more.
For instance
, when a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
worker
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earns
handsome earning in a month
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of his/her
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
he/she will definitely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
more encouragement to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earn
more extra in the future.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
ways are
also
available to inspire
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
harder.
Firstly
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
can arrange
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
welfare facilities such as free medical treatment, free education for their children, cost free
Possible spelling mistake found.
accomodation
Possible spelling mistake found.
et cetera
. These facilities could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to influence
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
for assiduous.
Additionally
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
's top management can promote their extraordinary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
as a reward for their
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
mind blowing
performance. This job promotion, can definitely boost their performance for future.

To conclude
, every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
of a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
wants job satisfaction with high wages. No doubt is better to reward them as per their output
nevertheless
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
ways, such as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employee
welfare schemes are
also
playing well to push them to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
The man who does not know other languages, unless he is a man of genius, necessarily has deficiencies in his ideas.
Victor Hugo

IELTS essay Discuss the benefits and drawbacks of pet ownership for animals and for the community as a whole v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
252 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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