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describe an object that is very special in your life. explain why this object is important to you. include details and examples in your explanation. v.3

describe an object that is very special in your life. explain why this object is important to you. include details and examples in your explanation. v. 3
Wealth and joyfulness are paramount in one’s life. However, there has been a debate among the majority of people that riches do not equate cheerfulness. The reasons why happiness is tough to interpret, and how people could achieve it would be discussed. Firstly, one of the reasons why it is arduous to depict happiness is that it cannot be quantified. In other words, being joyous cannot be measured or numerically attached because it is determined and controlled by one’s emotion. Another reason why it is hard to define joyfulness is that it is unpredictable. People’s expectation are sometimes not met, and a result of this, people’s reaction or response to this situation makes it difficult to define happiness. For instance, my wife currently works as a class teacher in one of the Nursery Schools with a good salary, but she’s not happy because her expectation was that she would get a job, even if it is with a lesser salary than teaching, as a make-up artist with one of the cosmetology companies. Nevertheless, there are various ways in which people can attain a state of being happy. One of these major ways is self-contentment. Being satisfied with whatever one has, has proven to be effective in gaining happiness. Another way to earn happiness is by doing or following one’s heart desires. It is believed by some persons that passion birth happiness. That is, one could derive joy from doing something passionately. To illustrate, a research conducted by the World Health Organization in the year 2018 showed that Doctors in the Eastern part of Africa are happy with the nature of their job despite the fact that they are being underpaid. In conclusion, while the major reasons why joyfulness is hard to define is that it cannot be quantified, and it cannot be predictable, self-contentment and following one’s heart desires are factors people could use to earn a state of being happy.
Wealth and joyfulness are paramount in one’s life.
However
, there has been a debate among the majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
that riches do not equate cheerfulness. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
why
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
is tough to interpret, and how
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
could achieve it would
be discussed
.

Firstly
, one of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
why it is arduous to depict
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
is that it cannot
be quantified
.
In other words
, being joyous cannot
be measured
or
numerically
attached
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it
is determined
and controlled by one’s emotion. Another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reason
why it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to define joyfulness is that it is unpredictable.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People’s
expectation are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
not met, and a result of this,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
reaction or response to this situation
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
it difficult to define
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
.
For instance
, my wife
currently
works as a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
teacher in one of the Nursery Schools with a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
salary,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
she’s not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happy
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
her expectation was that she would
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a job, even if it is with a lesser salary than teaching, as a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
-up artist with one of the cosmetology
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
.

Nevertheless
, there are various ways in which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can attain a state of being
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happy
. One of these major ways is self-contentment.
Being satisfied
with whatever one has, has proven to be effective in gaining
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
. Another way to earn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
is by doing or following one’s heart desires. It
is believed
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
persons that passion birth
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
.
That is
, one could derive joy from doing something
passionately
. To illustrate,
Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply "research".
a research
conducted by the World Health Organization in the year 2018
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
that Doctors in the Eastern part of Africa are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happy
with the nature of their job despite the fact that they are being underpaid.

In conclusion
, while the major
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reasons
why joyfulness is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to define is that it cannot
be quantified
, and it cannot be predictable, self-contentment and following one’s heart desires are factors
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
to earn a state of being
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happy
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
Language is the road map of a culture. It tells you where its people come from and where they are going.
Rita Mae Brown

IELTS essay describe an object that is very special in your life. explain why this object is important to you. include details and examples in your explanation. v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
321 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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