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demand of oil and gases are increasing, findings new sources in remote and untouched areas is necessity. Discuss advantages outweighs disadvantages. v.1

demand of oil and gases are increasing, findings new sources in remote and untouched areas is necessity. Discuss advantages outweighs disadvantages. v. 1
Fossil fuel plays crucial role in every country in their development because most industries are based on consumption of energy fuels. It is observed that, oil and gas is rising with time, so new sources can be established in various areas efficiently. This essay shows that cons outweighs the pros with certain reasons, eventually end with reasonable conclusion. To begin with, as the increasing consumption of fuel with pace of time. As a result, their demand is rising, which cause so many problems related to the environment as well as with health of individuals. Firstly, the constructing of new sources of fossil fuels lead disruption to environmental. In addition to it, the ecological life cycle is very much affected due to this. Therefore, the flora and fauna gets hazards. Secondly, there is a risk to the health of people. While producing the fossil fuels like petrol, gas which emits many pernicious residue, they make the higher chances of illness and lead maximum diseases. Furthermore, the establishing any source of power like petrol plant, thermal plant which is very expensive in implementation. Therefore, a large sum of budget is required to make it possible to construct the fresh energy sources. Sometimes, these sources in the remote areas and untouched areas are under, the chances of any leakage which can cause a big blast or life threats. However, as the how many disadvantages of introducing new sources of energy, but it has merit also. By increasing demand of users, the recent sources become short in supply. The current source remains totally halfed and for this new energy body are required to fulfil the demand of users. The better idea, instead of new sources of fuel, authority should use the natural resources for creating energy from sunlight, oceans and winds. These elements provide a new form of energy which is much better to fossil fuel. In conclusion, there are many reasons which shows that how demerits over to merits such as health problems and less economic. And there is an other way to fulfil the needs of consumers by using natural bodies to produce energy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Fossil
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuel
plays crucial role in every country in their development
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
most industries
are based
on consumption of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuels
. It
is observed
that, oil and gas is rising with time,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sources
can
be established
in various areas
efficiently
. This essay
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that cons outweighs the pros with certain reasons,
eventually
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
with reasonable conclusion.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, as the increasing consumption of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuel
with pace of time.
As a result
, their demand is rising, which cause
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
problems related to the environment
as well
as with health of individuals.
Firstly
, the constructing of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sources
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fossil
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuels
lead disruption to environmental.
In addition
to it, the ecological life cycle is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
much
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
due to this.
Therefore
, the flora and fauna
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
hazards.
Secondly
, there is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risk
to the health of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
. While producing the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fossil
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuels
like petrol, gas which emits
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
pernicious residue, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the higher chances of illness and lead maximum diseases.

Furthermore
, the establishing any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
source
of power like petrol plant, thermal plant which is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
expensive in implementation.
Therefore
, a large sum of budget
is required
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it possible to construct the fresh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sources
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Sometimes
, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sources
in the remote areas and untouched areas are under, the chances of any leakage which can cause a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
blast or life threats.

However
, as
Did you mean "how"?
the how
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
disadvantages of introducing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sources
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it has merit
also
. By increasing demand of users, the recent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sources
become short in supply. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
source
remains
totally
Possible spelling mistake found.
halfed
and for this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
body
are required
to fulfil the demand of users. The better
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
,
instead
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sources
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fuel
, authority should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the natural resources for creating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
from sunlight, oceans and winds. These elements provide a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
form of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
energy
which is much better to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fossil
fuel.

In conclusion
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
reasons which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that how demerits over to merits such as health problems and less economic. And there is
This word is normally spelled as one.
an other
way to fulfil the needs of consumers by using natural bodies to produce
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
energy
15Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
32Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay demand of oil and gases are increasing, findings new sources in remote and untouched areas is necessity. Discuss advantages outweighs disadvantages. v. 1

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
351 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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