Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Demand for gas and oil is increasing and so finding new sources in remote and untouched areas is a necessity. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages? v.3

Demand for gas and oil is increasing and so finding new sources in remote and untouched areas is a necessity. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages? v. 3
As using more and more fossil oil products boomed in the last century, the issue of finding new and sustainable sources has risen significantly. There are groups of people that believe the exploratory expedition to discover pristine sources should continue in order to support its consumers. While this mindset may have its advantages, there are also some drawbacks that should be addressed. One of the main advantages that new excavations bring is that they ensure the continuity of the raw product to be used in the industries, for example oil refineries. By securing the flow of raw material, they avoid disrupting the current production line, which could have significantly damaging financial and technical effect. For example a petrochemical facility failing to procure the required materials, will be faced with monetary issued due to lack of sales and will also need an overhaul due to the interrupt in the production line. On the other hand, altering the whole implemented system to use another source is either extremely costly or sometimes impossible. For example, redesigning a powerplant to use clean energy instead of gas is ought to be incredibly expensive, let alone tremendously complex. But this should also be considered that discovering a new field which is rich enough with oil or gas to be used as an upcoming source is not always an economical choice either. The cost of exploration, research, analysis, and examination that should be done is remarkably high too. This would raise the price of the substance, which raises the production costs, making the whole process less cost-effective. The same reasoning could be applied to transportation. Since the new lands are likely to be more distant than the current sources, the added miles will emerge extra transportation cost, rendering the outcome less beneficial. By the way of conclusion, the ever increasing demand for oil and gas has forced us to look for fresh sources of this kind of fuel. For this reason, it is necessary to explore the parts of the planet that are still uninfluenced. Although this is apparently economically and technically helpful to entities consuming these materials, there might be unaccounted costs involved.
As using more and more fossil
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
oil
products boomed in the last century, the issue of finding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
and sustainable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sources
has risen
significantly
. There are groups of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
that believe the exploratory expedition to discover pristine
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sources
should continue in order to support its consumers. While this mindset may have its advantages, there are
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
drawbacks that should
be addressed
.

One of the main advantages that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
excavations bring is that they ensure the continuity of the raw product to be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in the industries,
for example
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
oil
refineries. By securing the flow of raw material, they avoid disrupting the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
production line, which could have
significantly
damaging financial and technical effect.
For example
a petrochemical facility failing to procure the required materials, will
be faced
with monetary issued due to lack of sales and will
also
need an overhaul due to the interrupt in the production line.
On the other hand
, altering the whole implemented system to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
source
is either
extremely
costly or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
impossible.
For example
, redesigning a
Possible spelling mistake found.
powerplant
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
clean energy
instead
of gas is ought to be
incredibly
expensive,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
alone
tremendously
complex.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
this should
also
be considered
that discovering a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
field which is rich
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
oil
or gas to be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
as an upcoming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
source
is not always an economical choice either. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
of exploration, research, analysis, and examination that should
be done
is
remarkably
high too. This would raise the price of the substance, which raises the production
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
costs
, making the whole process less cost-effective. The same reasoning could
be applied
to transportation. Since the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
lands are likely to be more distant than the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sources
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
added
miles will emerge extra transportation
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cost
, rendering the outcome less beneficial.

By the way of conclusion, the
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
ever increasing
demand for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
oil
and gas has forced us to look for fresh
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sources
of this kind of fuel.
For this reason
, it is necessary to explore the parts of the planet that are
still
uninfluenced. Although this is
apparently
economically
and
technically
helpful to entities consuming these materials, there might
be unaccounted
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
costs
involved.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
18Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Demand for gas and oil is increasing and so finding new sources in remote and untouched areas is a necessity. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages? v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
357 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts