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Corruption becomes a common disease among several nations What are the causes and measures to resolve this trend Give your own examples and explain v.2

Corruption becomes a common disease among several nations What are the causes and measures to resolve this trend Give your own examples and explain v. 2
Bribe becomes a dreadful disease in several nations, where only rich people are able to enjoy various benefits. Common people are forced to pay extra to avail the most of the government services. In the following passage, I will explain both reason and measured to change this trend. Few decades ago, bribe is an unknown term among people, but this has changed over the years. When government employees are paid with meagre salary, they are forced to bribe for the service they do and it spreads like a common disease in most of the departments. There is no standardized salary structure between state and private sector staff, which provoke them earn extra for all the obliged services. Moreover, with the minimum package they are unable to pay satisfy their dependent’s educational needs as well as to provide quality medical treatment during emergency situations. Furthermore, the increasing fee structure among academic institutions forces them to bribe in order to cater quality education for their children, which is vital for their career. For instance, my neighbour works in state job got caught due to corruption charges and the only reason is to provide optimum treatment for his injured son. Therefore, it is believed, different salary structure and incomparable quality of service between private and government hospital and schools are the major reasons for this trend. Do common people’s living conditions are affected with corruption? Yes. At the present to get most of the government service people are forced to pay extra as bribe, where some poor people unable to find money end up in bad living standards. For example, countries such as Canada and Australia, offer unpaid medical and academic facilities to all citizens, such system should be introduced to eradicate this disease. Additionally, all the state and central jobs should be equally paid according to market standards, which will reduce huge finance gap among all employees. Also, the tax authorities should find optimum ways to ensure all business me pay tax genuinely. So that it helps the nation to reduce the price of domestic products and pass the benefits to locals. Thus, it is assumed, unpaid medical and educational facilities and standardised salary structure across government staff can reduce corruption significantly. To sum up, as the proverb says, ” prevention is better than cure”. If the government hasn’t take prompt action to reduce corruption then it will impacts common people’s living condition drastically.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Bribe
becomes a dreadful disease in several nations, where
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
rich
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are able to enjoy various benefits.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Common
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are forced
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
extra to avail the most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
. In the following passage, I will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
both reason and measured to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
this trend.

Few decades ago,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bribe
is an unknown term among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
this has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
over the years. When
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
employees
are paid
with
Possible spelling mistake. 'meagre' is British English.
meagre
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salary
, they
are forced
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bribe
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
they do and it spreads like a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
common
disease in most of the departments. There is no standardized
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
structure
between state and private sector staff, which provoke them earn extra for all the obliged
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
.
Moreover
, with the minimum package they are unable to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
satisfy their dependent’s educational needs
as well
as to provide quality medical treatment during emergency situations.
Furthermore
, the increasing fee
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
structure
among academic institutions forces them to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bribe
in order to cater quality education for their children, which is vital for their career.
For instance
, my
Possible spelling mistake. 'neighbour' is British English.
neighbour
works in state job
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
caught due to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
corruption
charges and the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
reason is to provide optimum treatment for his injured son.
Therefore
, it
is believed
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
structure
and incomparable quality of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
between private and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
hospital and schools are the major reasons for this trend.

Do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
common
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
living conditions are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
corruption
? Yes. At the present to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are forced
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
extra as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
bribe
, where
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
unable to find money
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
up in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
living standards.
For example
, countries such as Canada and Australia, offer unpaid medical and academic facilities to all citizens, such system should
be introduced
to eradicate this disease.
Additionally
, all the state and central jobs should be
equally
paid according to market standards, which will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reduce
huge finance gap among all employees.
Also
, the tax authorities should find optimum ways to ensure all business me
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pay
tax
genuinely
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
that it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
the nation to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reduce
the price of domestic products and pass the benefits to locals.
Thus
, it
is assumed
, unpaid medical and educational facilities and
Do not mix variants of the same word ('standardise' and 'standardize') within a single text.
standardised
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
structure
across
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
staff can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reduce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
corruption
significantly
.

To sum up, as the proverb says,
Don't put a space on both sides of a quote symbol
”
prevention is better than cure”. If the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
Did you mean "hasn’t taken"?
hasn’t take
prompt action to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
reduce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
corruption
then it will
The verb 'will' requires the base form of the verb: "impact"
impacts
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
common
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
living condition
drastically
.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
47Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Mistakes

IELTS essay Corruption becomes a common disease among several nations What are the causes and measures to resolve this trend Give your own examples and explain v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
402 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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