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Computers are often argued to be the most important invention of the last hundred years. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. v.9

Computers are often argued to be the most important invention of the last hundred years. with this statement? v. 9
Although computers have changed the way we live, it is important to remember that many other inventions have changed our everyday life over the past century. In this essay, I will discuss both sides of the argument and explain why I tend to agree with the latter one. Nowadays, it is undeniable that computers are essential tools in our works and everyday lives. This is because they can do some of our work more efficiently than us and can stock millions of data that are easily accessible all over the world. To cite an example, computers are crucial in the medical sector, because thanks to them, doctors are aware of the whole background of a patient in a few seconds only. If computers were not available, doctors would have to check every background of a patient themselves and this would take hours that are better spent caring for patients. On the other hand, computers are very important but maybe not the most important invention. Over the last century, many others breakthrough have been experienced such as the transport revolution. The reason why transport is so important is that the creation of cars and planes have led to globalisation. If this invention had not happened, it would be impossible to travel so easily, and trade would be more complicated than it is nowadays. To conclude, despite the major contribution of computers in easing our professional lives, I believe that others crucial inventions have been made in the last century. Personally, I feel that transport revolution has simplified our lives as much as computers did.
Although computers have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
the way we
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
live
, it is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
to remember that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
inventions have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
our everyday life over the past century. In this essay, I will discuss both sides of the argument and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
why I tend to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the latter one.

Nowadays, it is undeniable that computers are essential tools in our works and everyday
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they can do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of our work more
efficiently
than us and can stock millions of data that are
easily
accessible all over the world. To cite an example, computers are crucial in the medical sector,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
thanks to them, doctors are aware of the whole background of a patient in a few seconds
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
. If computers were not available, doctors would
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
every background of a patient themselves and this would take hours that are better spent caring for patients.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, computers are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
maybe not the most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
invention. Over the last century,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "others'" or "other's"?
others
breakthrough have
been experienced
such as the transport revolution. The reason why transport is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
is that the creation of cars and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
planes
have led to
Possible spelling mistake. 'globalisation' is British English.
globalisation
. If this invention had not happened, it would be impossible to travel
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
easily
, and trade would be more complicated than it is nowadays.

To conclude
, despite the major contribution of computers in easing our professional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
, I believe that others crucial inventions have
been made
in the last century.
Personally
, I feel that transport revolution has simplified our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lives
as much as computers did.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
A special kind of beauty exists which is born in language, of language, and for language.
Gaston Bachelard

IELTS essay Computers are often argued to be the most important invention of the last hundred years. with this statement? v. 9

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
263 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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