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Completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a good job. On the other hand, other people think that getting experience and developing soft skills is more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion. v.9

It is argued by some people that getting a university degree is the best way to get a good job, while others think that improving soft skills and getting experience is way important. In my opinion, I think that it depends on the job type and the field one is trying to get into. Completing university education is important to get some types of jobs such as medical and teaching jobs. These types of jobs requires special knowledge and skills that, most of the time, can not be grasped anywhere but the university. For example, it does not make sense to hire a doctor that took online courses online or some skills in a workshop. Also, teaching skills is a complicated thing that one can not learn on his own. For such careers, I agree that the person should get a degree to get into them. On the other hand, enrolling into online courses or taking certain workshops to get knowledge or some skills is more than enough for business and programming careers. There are a lot of material, online or in workshops, that convey the information needed to people even better than a university class since one is enrolled to get a specific type of knowledge. So, if one is intending to learn a programming language, he can simply take a specialised course for this sake, and no need to go to the university to gain such skill. I believe that such jobs require skills that can be gained without a university degree. To sum up, although the university degree can boost one chances to find a good job, some types of jobs require certain skills that can be self-gained without a degree.
It
is argued
by
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some
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people
that getting a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
degree
is the best way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a
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good
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job
, while others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that improving soft
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skills
and getting experience is way
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
. In my opinion, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it depends on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
type
and the field one is trying to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
into.

Completing
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university
education is
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important
to
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get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
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types
of
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jobs
such as medical and teaching
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jobs
. These
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types
of
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jobs
You should probably use “require”.
requires
special knowledge and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
that, most of the time, can not
be grasped
anywhere
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the
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university
.
For example
, it does not
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make
sense to hire a doctor that took
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
courses
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
or
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
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skills
in a workshop.
Also
, teaching
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skills
is a complicated thing that one can not learn on his
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
. For such careers, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that the person should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a
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degree
to
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get
into them.

On the other hand
, enrolling into
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
courses or taking certain workshops to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
knowledge or
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
is more than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
for business and programming careers. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
material,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
or in workshops, that convey the information needed to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
even better than a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
since one
is enrolled
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a specific
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type
of knowledge.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, if one is intending to learn a programming language, he can
simply
take a
Possible spelling mistake. ‘specialised’ is British English.
specialised
course for this sake, and no need to go to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
to gain such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skill
. I believe that such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
require
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
that can
be gained
without a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
degree.

To sum up, although the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
degree
can boost one chances to find a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
types
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
require certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
that can be self-gained without a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
degree
.
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IELTS essay Completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a good job. On the other hand, other people think that getting experience and developing soft skills is more important.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
284 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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