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Children over 15 years should be allowed to take their own decision without any interference from Their parents. Do you agree or disagree? v.1

Children over 15 years should be allowed to take their own decision without any interference from Their parents. v. 1
These days, it is unnecessary for humans to consume animal-based food and items. I completely agree with this view, even though many people believe that human independence on animals is impossible. There are numerous alternatives to animals in the food industry. With the abundant availability of food such as grains and pulses, it is easy to get all the nutrients needed, which is rich in fibre, helping prevent cancer of the colon. Scientists have successfully invented alternative foods taste like meat, but are made of soybeans. Citizens eating these fake meat dishes can remain vegetarian and still get the nutrients they need. Many studies show that a plant-based diet not only provides sufficient nutrients for our body to function normally, but also helps us prevent various potential health issues such as diabetes, high blood pressure or heart attacks. In terms of clothing, humans do not need to sacrifice animals' life, for producing jackets or jeans. Today, artificial fur and high-quality synthesized fabric are being used to replace fur and other body parts of animals. Clothes made of these materials are warmer and softer than the natural materials and waste less initial and maintenance cost. Besides, +animal testing has played an essential role in the medical field. In recent years, however, with the development of technology, we can alter animal experiments with sophisticated computer programs that could provide more accurate results. For instance, computer-based testing has been used to test the safety of new drugs or cancer treatments and has proved effective. It is, therefore, no longer necessary to use animals for new medicine testing or treatments. In conclusion, I firmly hold the view that in modern life inhabitants no longer need to use products from animals, such as food, clothing items or even medicine.
These days, it is unnecessary for humans to consume animal-based
food
and items. I completely
agree
with this view,
even though
many
people
believe that human independence on
animals
is impossible.

There are numerous alternatives to
animals
in the
food
industry. With the abundant availability of
food
such as grains and pulses, it is easy to
get
all the nutrients needed, which is rich in
fibre
, helping
prevent
cancer of the colon. Scientists have
successfully
invented alternative
foods
taste like meat,
but
are made
of soybeans. Citizens eating these fake meat dishes can remain vegetarian and
still
get
the nutrients they need.
Many
studies
show
that a plant-based diet not
only
provides sufficient nutrients for our body to function
normally
,
but
also
helps
us
prevent
various potential health issues such as diabetes, high blood pressure or heart attacks.

In terms of clothing, humans do not need to sacrifice animals' life, for producing jackets or jeans.
Today
, artificial fur and high-quality synthesized fabric are being
used
to replace fur and other body parts of
animals
. Clothes made of these materials are warmer and softer than the natural materials and waste less initial and maintenance cost.
Besides
,
+animal
testing has played an essential role in the medical field. In recent years,
however
, with the development of technology, we can alter
animal
experiments with sophisticated computer programs that could provide more accurate results.
For instance
, computer-based testing has been
used
to
test
the safety of new drugs or cancer treatments and has proved effective. It is,
therefore
, no longer necessary to
use
animals
for new medicine testing or treatments.

In conclusion
, I
firmly
hold the view that in modern life inhabitants no longer need to
use
products from
animals
, such as
food
, clothing items or even medicine.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes
The limits of my language mean the limits of my world.
Ludwig Wittgenstein

IELTS essay Children over 15 years should be allowed to take their own decision without any interference from Their parents. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
294 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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