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Children are now less active in their free time than in the past. Therefore, sports lessons must be compulsory in school. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Children are less active in their free time than in the past. Therefore, sports lessons must be compulsory in schools. v. 2
Today's, youth people are less active than the past, because of many reasons. A number of people think that it must be essential for kids to have sport curriculum in their schools, that I agree with their opinion. This essay will describe the reasons that why I support this idea. Physical activity is vital for mental health. There is an expression that say the healthy brain is in a healthy body, In other word it is essential for students to play and be more active, whereas children spend there most of their time in school, then school must give them this opportunity. Investigation in japanese students demonstrated that the schools which had sport course in there plan, got better results whether in exam or for taking place in a renowned university. Moreover exercise release endorphins, the chemical that improve moods, and due to this, students can be more concentrate on the lecture such as math and science. The other reason for making sport lessons compulsive, is that when students will grow inactive, it causes many health problems in their own life, in result government shall spend a large amount of money for their health care. For instance, in U. S. every year government outlay a huge number part of its budget for caregiver to obese and overweight disorder, like cardio and bone disease. However it would have more benefits to dedicate this expenses for their childhood by equipment their schools with variety of sports facilities that cause a healthy generation. In result, schools have to attend to make sports lessons a part of schools plan, because in this way society will face with an intelligent and healthy generation that has many benefits for government though.
Today
's, youth
people
are less active than the past,
because
of
many
reasons. A number of
people
think
that it
must
be essential for kids to have
sport
curriculum in their
schools
, that I
agree
with their opinion. This essay will
describe
the reasons that why I support this
idea
.

Physical activity is vital for mental health. There is an expression that say the
healthy
brain is in a
healthy
body, In other word it is essential for
students
to play and be more active, whereas children spend there most of their time in
school
, then
school
must
give them this opportunity. Investigation in
japanese
students
demonstrated that the
schools
which had
sport
course in
there
plan,
got
better results whether in exam or for taking place in a renowned university.
Moreover
exercise release endorphins, the chemical that
improve
moods, and due to this,
students
can be more concentrate on the lecture such as math and science.

The other reason for making
sport
lessons compulsive, is that when
students
will grow inactive, it causes
many
health problems in their
own
life, in result
government
shall spend a large amount of money for their health care.
For instance
, in U. S. every year
government
outlay a huge number part of its budget for caregiver to obese and overweight disorder, like cardio and bone disease.
However
it would have more benefits to dedicate this expenses for their childhood by equipment their
schools
with variety of
sports
facilities that cause a
healthy
generation.

In result,
schools
have to
attend to
make
sports
lessons a part of
schools
plan,
because
in this way society will face with an intelligent and
healthy
generation that has
many
benefits for
government
though.
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Ludwig Wittgenstein

IELTS essay Children are now less active in their free time than in the past. Therefore, sports lessons must be compulsory in school.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
285 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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