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Car ownership has increased rapidly over the past thirty years v.1

Car ownership has increased rapidly over the past thirty years v. 1
It is widely believed that the number of car owners has spiraled out of control, which has led to terrible traffic jam frequently in many cities over the last 30 years. In my opinion, I agree with this statement because it increases the number of vehicles on road, so it will create bad traffic congestion. In this essay, I am going to explain this reason and give some solution for curtailing using of cars in cities. Obviously, the increasing number of private cars swells the ranks of vehicles riding on the road. Therefore, it causes bad traffic jams. Take Hanoi as an example; the annual rise rate of car ownership in this city was 20% in 2019, which makes Hanoi is grappling with the worst traffic jamstraffic jams in on-peak hours in recent years. It has an extremely adverse effect on the people’s daily lives. However, I believe that there is also some plausible solution for the municipal governments, which may reduce bottleneck risks. Firstly, the authorities can increase the inner-city road tax for private cars. It is clearly that when the expenses for a car go up, owners will bound to consider using private cars. Hanoi, for example, the government decided to impose a new tax law for private cars last year, from 1000 dollars up to 2500 dollars and the register for a new car will charge extra 10% of the car’s value. It has made people rethink of owning or using a private car. There are also many other measures for helping ease traffic, such as raising transportation law implementation awareness or building new roads, etc. But it seems for long-term plans. In conclusion, I believe that the increase of car owners is one of the reasons for the terrible traffic congestion, but by rising toll, raising awareness or building roads, the government may dishearten people from using their cars.
It is
widely
believed that the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
owners has spiraled out of control, which has led to terrible
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
jam
frequently
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
cities over the last 30 years. In my opinion, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this statement
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it increases the number of vehicles on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it will create
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
congestion. In this essay, I am going to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
this reason and give
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
solution for curtailing using of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
in cities.

Obviously
, the increasing number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
swells the ranks of vehicles riding on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
.
Therefore
, it causes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
jams. Take Hanoi as an example; the annual rise rate of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
ownership in this city was 20% in 2019, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
Hanoi is grappling with the worst
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
Possible spelling mistake found.
jamstraffic
jams in on-peak hours in recent years. It has an
extremely
adverse effect on the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
’s daily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.

However
, I believe that there is
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
plausible solution for the municipal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
, which may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
bottleneck
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risks
.
Firstly
, the authorities can increase the inner-city
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
tax for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
. It is
clearly
that when the expenses for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
go up, owners will
This form is ambiguous and can be used as past tense. Confirm that you are using the intended base form of the main verb after 'to do' as an auxiliary verb..
bound
to consider using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
. Hanoi,
for example
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
decided to impose a new tax law for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
last year, from 1000 dollars up to 2500 dollars and the register for a new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
will charge extra 10% of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car’s
value. It has made
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
rethink of owning or using a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
. There are
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
other measures for helping
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ease
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
, such as raising transportation law implementation awareness or building new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
, etc.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
it seems for long-term plans.

In conclusion
, I believe that the increase of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
car
owners is one of the reasons for the terrible
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traffic
congestion,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
by rising toll, raising awareness or building
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
may dishearten
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
from using their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cars
.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
29Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Car ownership has increased rapidly over the past thirty years v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
313 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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