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By punishing murderer with the death penalty, society is also guilty of committing murder. Therefore, life in prison is a better punishment for murderers. v.2

By punishing murderer with the death penalty, society is also guilty of committing murder. Therefore, life in prison is a better punishment for murderers. v. 2
Nowadays, more and more countries are avoiding from death penalty for criminals. Last decades, there were a high percentage of murderer numbers who is in prison. Some argue that society will be guilty as criminals if murderers are penalized with the corporal punishment and it would be better when murderers in prison for a life. I partially agree with this opinion and in this essay I will show both side of argument and give examples. In general, into United Nations Organization has a Human Rights department. It can be seen that most of country in the world already have enrolled to this organization. If country the member of this organization, they should obey to their rules whereas some countries punish murderers by killing them. Also people have their own rights and the government should respect them and on trial judges and juries have to take into account. I totally agree with point because of law works for everyone equally. Turning to the other side of argument, in many cases murderers have adequate barrister and he might be innocent on trial and someone condemn them unfairly. Consequently, murderer will do his activity again and again. I partially disagree to decision for a life prison to all murderers. That’s why for serial murderer who committed a crime frequently the government should apply a death because they never be rehabilitated in prison. To sum up, giving punishment to murderers cannot be easy as well. There should be taken all factor to perform victim whether the murderer lives or not. It has both pros and cons decision, by the way people should be more merciful to criminals. I believe that murderers get suitable punishment for their guilts.
Nowadays, more and more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
are avoiding from death penalty for criminals. Last decades, there were a high percentage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
murderer
numbers who is in prison.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
argue that society will be guilty as criminals if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
murderers
are penalized
with the corporal punishment and it would be better when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
murderers
in prison for a life. I
partially
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this opinion and in this essay I will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
both side of argument and give examples.

In general
, into United Nations Organization has a Human Rights department. It can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that most of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
in the world already have enrolled to this organization. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
the member of this organization, they should obey to their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
whereas
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
punish
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
murderers
by killing them.
Also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
rights and the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should respect them and on trial judges and juries
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
take into account. I
totally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with point
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of law works for everyone
equally
.

Turning to the other side of argument, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
cases
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
murderers
have adequate
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
barrister and
he might be innocent on trial and someone
The pronoun 'someone' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "condemns", "condemned".
condemn
them
unfairly
.
Consequently
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
murderer
will do his activity again and again. I
partially
disagree to decision for a life prison to all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
murderers
. That’s why for serial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
murderer
who committed a crime
frequently
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should apply a death
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they never
be rehabilitated
in prison.

To sum up, giving punishment to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
murderers
cannot be easy
as well
. There should
be taken
all factor to perform victim whether the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
murderer
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
or not. It has both pros and cons decision, by the way
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
should be more merciful to criminals. I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
murderers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
suitable punishment for their
Possible spelling mistake found.
guilts
.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
15Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes

IELTS essay By punishing murderer with the death penalty, society is also guilty of committing murder. Therefore, life in prison is a better punishment for murderers. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
283 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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