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Buying things on the Internet, such as books, air tickets and groceries, is becoming more and more popular. Do the advantages of shopping in this way outweigh the disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words. v.2

Nowadays, there is a controversial issue that relates to whether shopping online is considered as benefitial for the society or not. There is no doubt that these days people tend to prefer shopping online that shopping at the nearest store. In this essay, the different advantages that lead most people to shop online, and the few drawbacks that prevent people from shopping online will be presented in detail. Aby is a scientist, who is specialized in information technology, conducted a research which was about the various methods that were used by people to shop. After analyzing the data, it has been found that more than three quarters of people in the world were buying their essential needs such as: books, air tickets and groceries online. The findings of the research proved that those people were using online websites for many reasons. The primary reason given to support the claim is flexibility. Shopping online is described as a flexible way since people can shop whatever they need regardless of the place of the product. In other words, they can buy any brand even if it is located at a far place. That is because they have the chance to buy it then track their shipment through the use of online tool till they get it. On the other hand, many people claim that shopping online is something horrible, and it has some drawbacks. a great illustration for this is that there are a number of unreal websites that show that they sell various products that are difficult to find effortlessly. They design their website in a way that attracts the consumer and leads him to buy. After that phase, they are going to get the money and block the user of the consumer. This is because they do not want anymore to let the consumer contact them. To sum up, both, traditional shopping and online shopping have their merits. On balance, however, I feel that shopping online is useful. That is because it lets people have the opportunity to buy anything at any time.
Nowadays, there is a controversial issue that relates to whether
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
is considered
as
Possible spelling mistake found.
benefitial
for the society or not. There is no doubt that these days
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
tend to prefer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
at the nearest store. In this essay, the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
advantages that lead most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to shop
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
, and the few drawbacks that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
will
be presented
in detail.

Possible spelling mistake found.
Aby
is a scientist, who
is specialized
in information technology, conducted a research which was about the various methods that were
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to shop. After analyzing the data, it has
been found
that more than three quarters of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in the world were buying their essential needs such as: books, air tickets and groceries
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
. The findings of the research proved that those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
were using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
websites for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
reasons. The primary reason
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
to support the claim is flexibility.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Shopping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
described
as a flexible way since
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can shop whatever they need regardless of the place of the product.
In other words
, they can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
any brand even if it
is located
at a far place.
That is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they have the chance to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
it then
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
track
their shipment through the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
tool till they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
it.

On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
claim that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
is something horrible, and it has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
drawbacks.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter.
a
great illustration for this is that there are a number of unreal websites that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
that they sell various products that are difficult to find
effortlessly
. They design their website in a way that attracts the consumer and leads him to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
. After that phase, they are going to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the money and block the user of the consumer. This is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they do not want anymore to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
the consumer contact them.

To sum up, both, traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
have their merits. On balance,
however
, I feel that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
is useful.
That is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lets
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have the opportunity to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
anything at any time.
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Language is not a genetic gift, it is a social gift. Learning a new language is becoming a member of the club – the community of speakers of that language.
Frank Smith

IELTS essay Buying things on the Internet, such as books, air tickets and groceries, is becoming more and more popular. Do the advantages of shopping in this way outweigh the disadvantages?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
343 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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