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Buying fashionable clothes is wasteful because people don't need new clothes all the time. Clothing should be bought and used more wisely. v.1

Buying fashionable clothes is wasteful because people don't need new clothes all the time. Clothing should be bought and used more wisely. v. 1
The relationship between people always transforms with the alteration of time because descent has more conversant and practice in their life. This condition also happens in the relationship among families, such as children and parents. Undoubtedly, when children have maturates, they will stress and parents need to be. This essay will present the role necessarily have done by parents at different times. Firstly, the nature of children's relationships with parents usually varies from fully dependent to a more equal, supportive partnerships between adult. When children have grown into adults, they will bear a lot of responsibilities and face different kinds of challenges. Furthermore, these challenges make them stressed, and they need some precise guidance and tips for backing their emotional condition. In addition, parent's support can turn back this difficult situation to great opportunities to learn and improves. For instance, in the previous years, I also had problems regarding this aspect, guidance from my parents convince me to solve one by one of my matter. Therefore, it is essential for parents to keep support children not only material but also for giving some recommendations. Besides, various studies have shown that emotional backing is the most desired form of help that every adult requires and only a few of them obtain an abundance of this backing. In addition, when parents give some temperamental backing, they also can teach some values, moral messages, and believes that can be a helpful lifetime. Moreover, they also can give appropriate aspects to make sure that the fellow can live peaceful and happy. For instance, my parents always invest their time to discuss something when we are ingesting. Hence, at the stage of confusion, parents, as a partner, also can grant some moral support for their descents. In conclusion, as children have maturates up, the parent's role shifts from the patron to the partner of discussion and guide. Above all, parents all must be supporters of their descendant's life.
The relationship between
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
always transforms with the alteration of time
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
descent has more conversant and practice in their life. This condition
also
happens in the relationship among families, such as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
.
Undoubtedly
, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
have maturates, they will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
need to be. This essay will present the role
necessarily
have done by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
at
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
times.

Firstly
, the nature of children's relationships with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
usually
varies from
fully
dependent to a more equal, supportive partnerships between adult. When
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
have grown into adults, they will bear
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
responsibilities and face
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
kinds of challenges.
Furthermore
, these challenges
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stressed
, and they need
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
precise guidance and tips for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
backing
their emotional condition.
In addition
, parent's support can turn back this difficult situation to great opportunities to learn and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improves
.
For instance
, in the previous years, I
also
had problems regarding this aspect, guidance from my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
convince me to solve one by one of my matter.
Therefore
, it is essential for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
support
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
material
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
for giving
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
recommendations.

Besides
, various studies have shown that emotional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
backing
is the most desired form of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
that every adult requires and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
a few of them obtain an abundance of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
backing
.
In addition
, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
give
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
temperamental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
backing
, they
also
can teach
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
values, moral messages, and believes that can be a helpful lifetime.
Moreover
, they
also
can give appropriate aspects to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
sure that the fellow can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
peaceful and happy.
For instance
, my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
always invest their time to discuss something when we are ingesting.
Hence
, at the stage of confusion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
, as a partner,
also
can grant
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
moral support for their descents.

In conclusion
, as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
have maturates up, the parent's role shifts from the patron to the partner of discussion and guide.
Above all
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
all
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be supporters of their descendant's life.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Buying fashionable clothes is wasteful because people don't need new clothes all the time. Clothing should be bought and used more wisely. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
323 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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