Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Both the poor and rich find accessibility into the university difficult. Do you agree or disagree v.1

Both the poor and rich find accessibility into the university difficult. v. 1
In recent times, the need to obtain a higher education is becoming increasingly popular. Although it is often believed that its accessibility remains a challenge to both the poor and the wealthy in many countries. This essay will discuss both sides and also show why I completely agree with the idea that it remains a challenge for both parties. The difficulty in gaining admission into a university setting remains an obstacle to both the poor and rich due to the requirements involved. Firstly, a common necessity is the fulfilment of the courses needed for a particular choice of field. This area is always necessary no matter the social staus the individual posseses. In addition to this, a personal statement is often required, and this is another standardized technique used to check a students suitability for admission. For instance, a student intending to study law may be asked for a statement of purpose of work/ volunteer experience that demonstrates why he should be admitted. Therefore, the requirements needed to get into a higher education is always important for all kinds of individuals. Despite the fact that requirements may be essential, social status has its influence. Whether an individual has wealth or not, poses an influence to the kind of University the individual attends. For instance, high reputable institutions are usually very expensive and this may not be affordable by someone from a poor background even with all necessary documents needed for an admission. However, another rich person who may have the needed criteria is able to get admission provided the fund is available. Although nowadays, circumstances may be changed due to availability of scholarships and grants for the less privileged. Consequntly, being wealthy or rich has its way of influencing accessibility into the university. To sum up, university education still takes a stance globally and therefore is of essence. This essay has discussed why I completely agree that getting into higher institution is a tough process, it is encountered by both the poor and the rich.
In recent times, the need to obtain a higher education is becoming
increasingly
popular. Although it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
believed that its accessibility remains a challenge to both the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
and the wealthy in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries. This essay will discuss both sides and
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
why I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that it remains a challenge for both parties.

The difficulty in gaining
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
admission
into a university setting remains an obstacle to both the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rich
due to the requirements involved.
Firstly
, a common necessity is the
Possible spelling mistake. 'fulfilment' is British English.
fulfilment
of the courses
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needed
for a particular choice of field. This area is always necessary no matter the social
Possible spelling mistake found.
staus
the individual
Possible spelling mistake found.
posseses
.
In addition
to this, a personal statement is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
required, and this is another standardized technique
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
a
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "students'" or "student's"?
students
suitability for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
admission
.
For instance
, a student intending to study law may be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
asked for
a statement of purpose of work/ volunteer experience that demonstrates why he should
be admitted
.
Therefore
, the requirements
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needed
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
into a higher education is always
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for all kinds of individuals.

Despite the fact that requirements may be essential, social status has its influence. Whether an individual has wealth or not, poses an influence to the kind of University the individual attends.
For instance
, high reputable institutions are
usually
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
expensive and this may not be affordable by someone from a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
background even with all necessary documents
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needed
for an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
admission
.
However
, another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rich
person who may have the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needed
criteria is able to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
admission
provided the fund is available. Although nowadays, circumstances may be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
due to availability of scholarships and grants for the less privileged.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Consequntly
, being wealthy or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rich
has its way of influencing accessibility into the university.

To sum up, university education
still
takes a stance globally and
therefore
is of essence. This essay has discussed why I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that getting into higher institution is a tough process, it
is encountered
by both the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
poor
and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rich
.
12Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
16Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes

IELTS essay Both the poor and rich find accessibility into the university difficult. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
335 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts