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Big salary is much more important than job satisfaction. Do you agree or disagree? v.10

Big salary is much more important than job satisfaction. v. 10
Keeping perception of living posh lifestyle, often people prefer high perks rather than gratification from the job. I staunchly disagree with the statement and the essay will shed light on the benefits which clarify that satisfaction plays a vital role in comparison to higher wages. To embark with, providing sense of fulfillment to people, jobs satisfaction comes with a guarantee which money cannot. Even if someone is earning a high salary, but feels tensed and compromises with his conscience, this person will not enjoy his life. A recent survey conducted states that, a lot of famous researchers chose the area of science, just not because of appealing wages, however, the reason was feeling of satisfaction as well as passion towards the same stream. Consequently, it is more important to select the kind of work that makes you happy. To add more, pursuing what you like, keeps you motivated and therefore leads to a carrier growth. To enunciate, having a strong relationship between job satisfaction and productivity. People who love their jobs can easily excel in their field of work and achieve better results in comparison to those who keep salary at first place. For instance, Henry Miller decided to leave his regular job with high perks and opted a carrier of a writer due to pursue his interest and got a success. Thus, advantage of jobs that that’s keeps you satisfied outweigh the drawbacks of low salary. To conclude, I strongly believe that job satisfaction is more fruitful rather than high salary because it makes people happy and motivated.
Keeping perception of living posh lifestyle,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
prefer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
perks
rather
than gratification from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
. I
staunchly
disagree with the statement and the essay will shed light on the benefits which clarify that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
plays a vital role
in comparison
to higher wages.

To embark with, providing sense of fulfillment to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
with a guarantee which money cannot. Even if someone is earning a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
salary,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
feels tensed and compromises with his conscience, this person will not enjoy his life. A recent survey conducted states that,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
famous
researchers chose the area of science,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of appealing wages,
however
, the reason was feeling of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
as well
as passion towards the same stream.
Consequently
, it is more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to select the kind of work that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
you happy.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
more, pursuing what you like,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keeps
you motivated and
therefore
leads to a carrier growth. To enunciate, having a strong relationship between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
and productivity.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
can
easily
excel in their field of work and achieve better results
in comparison
to those who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
salary at
first
place.
For instance
, Henry Miller decided to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
his regular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
perks and opted a carrier of a writer due to pursue his interest and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
a success.
Thus
, advantage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
Possible typo: you repeated a word
that that
’s
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keeps
you satisfied outweigh the drawbacks of low salary.

To conclude
, I
strongly
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
is more fruitful
rather
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
high
salary
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
happy and motivated.
14Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
20Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
As a hawk flieth not high with one wing, even so a man reacheth not to excellence with one tongue.
Roger Ascham

IELTS essay Big salary is much more important than job satisfaction. v. 10

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
259 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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