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Are famous people treated unfairly by the media? Should they be given more privacy, or is the price of their fame an invasion into their private life? Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. v.5

Are famous people treated unfairly by the media? Should they be given more privacy, or is the price of their fame an invasion into their private life? v. 5
People look forward to renowned personalities as their role model and tend to follow them wherever possible. However, complaints of popular personalities such as actors and sportsmen regarding breach of their privacy, is a matter of concern. In my opinion, every individual irrespective of their fame and status, has a right to lead their life in their own way. On one hand, famous people, who gained their fame from the public including media persons, are responsible to pay back to them. Not only it is the love of the common people which bought them fame, but also it is the love of media which provided them a platform to showcase their skills. For instance, many actors get a boost in their carrier, after being interviewed by a media spokesperson. Furthermore, people start considering them as inspiration and want to emulate them. To illustrate, many brands higher top actresses, as this will increase their sales by attracting people who are follower of those actresses. On the other hand, people forget that popular personalities have worked very hard to reach their current stature, and they should not be expected to entertain them all the time. Firstly, private life of every person is reserved for them, no one should invade without permission. Secondly, people earn the mastery of their fields through their diligence, determination and perseverance, to pursue their dreams and live life on their own terms. To Illustrate, Sachin Tendulkar, the famous cricketer, was considered as God of cricket, due to his skills and determination, and not due to people. To conclude, although famous personalities should conduct properly in public, they should not be expected to be always answerable and should always be approached on their approval.
People
look forward to renowned personalities as their role model and tend to follow them wherever possible.
However
, complaints of popular personalities such as actors and sportsmen regarding breach of their privacy, is a matter of concern. In my opinion, every individual irrespective of their fame and status, has a right to lead their life in their
own
way.

On one hand,
famous
people
, who gained their fame from the public including media persons, are responsible to pay back to them. Not
only
it is the
love
of the common
people
which
bought
them fame,
but
also
it is the
love
of media which provided them a platform to showcase their
skills
.
For instance
,
many
actors
get
a boost in their carrier, after
being interviewed
by a media spokesperson.
Furthermore
,
people
start
considering them as inspiration and want to emulate them. To illustrate,
many
brands higher top actresses, as this will increase their sales by attracting
people
who are follower of those actresses.

On the other hand
,
people
forget that popular personalities have worked
very
hard
to reach their
current
stature, and they should not be
expected
to entertain them all the time.
Firstly
, private life of every person
is reserved
for them, no one should invade without permission.
Secondly
,
people
earn the mastery of their fields through their diligence, determination and perseverance, to pursue their dreams and
live
life on their
own
terms. To Illustrate,
Sachin
Tendulkar
, the
famous
cricketer,
was considered
as God of cricket, due to his
skills
and determination, and not due to
people
.

To conclude
, although
famous
personalities should conduct
properly
in public, they should not be
expected
to be always answerable and should always
be approached
on their approval.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
Language is not a genetic gift, it is a social gift. Learning a new language is becoming a member of the club – the community of speakers of that language.
Frank Smith

IELTS essay Are famous people treated unfairly by the media? Should they be given more privacy, or is the price of their fame an invasion into their private life? v. 5

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
285 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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