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Animals are in danger of extinction. Some people say that we should protect only those animals, which are useful to humans. Do you agree or disagree?

Animals are in danger of extinction. Some people say that we should protect only those animals, which are useful to humans. v. 3
Animals are in danger of extinction. Some people say that we should protect only those animals, which ore useful to humans. Do you agree or disagree? - IELTS Writing task 2 Animal extinction has become a matter of great concern. L disagree with the given statement that we should conserve only those animals, which are beneficial to humans. I believe that all animals have direct or indirect effect on mankind. lt has been rightly said that plans to protect wildlife are in fact plans to protect man. The most important reason for saving all animals is that they are part of our ecosystem. Every species of wildlife plays a role to maintain the balance of life on Earth. Thus, the loss of any species can affect us directly or indirectly. For example, there are many bat species that are becoming extinct. Such bats help keep the insect population in control. lf these bats die then the insects will increase a lot and destroy our crops. So, we will have nothing to eat. ln addition, many animals, like rodents, help in the dispersal of plant seeds and in the pollination of plants. By protecting endangered animals, we ensure not only their survival but also the biodiversity that is necessary for the ecological health of the planet. Secondly, wild animals provide many valuable substances such as medicine and fur. The horn of the rhinoceros has medicinal value and the fur of the mink is very valuable. The recreational viewing of animals at zoos is also a source of revenue. Thus, the financial value of wild species is important to the economies of many nations. Furthermore, wild animals have aesthetic appeal. They are beautiful creatures of nature and are a part of our bio-diversity. Their beautiful and mysterious life has enchanted mankind since the dawn of evolution. Scientists have been awed, by observing their behaviour. Such study has helped scientists understand how the human body functions and why people behave as they do. Scientists have also gained medical knowledge by studying the effect of many drugs on these animals. Finally, it is undeniable that animal species have been vanishing at a much faster rate for about a century now due to human factors such as pollution, commercial overexploitation, poaching and deforestation. Knowingly or unknowingly, we humans are doing so much damage to plants and animals that working for their conservation has become a necessity. To sum up, it can be reiterated that saving all the animal species on the verge of extinction is well justified. All animals have direct or indirect relation to humans. So we should not work to save only those few species, which have a visible effect on humans
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Animals
are in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
danger
of extinction.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
say that we should protect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
, which ore useful to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
. Do you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
or disagree?
Consider using an m-dash in dialogues and enumerations.
-
IELTS Writing task
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
2 Animal
extinction has become a matter of great concern. L disagree with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
statement that we should conserve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
, which are beneficial to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
. I believe that all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
have direct or indirect effect on mankind.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
lt
has been
rightly
said that plans to protect wildlife are in fact plans to protect
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
.

The most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
reason for saving all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
is that they are part of our ecosystem. Every species of wildlife plays a role to maintain the balance of life on Earth.
Thus
, the loss of any species can affect us
directly
or
indirectly
.
For example
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
bat species that are becoming extinct. Such bats
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
the insect population in control.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
lf
these bats
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
die
then the insects will increase a lot and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroy
our crops.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, we will have nothing to eat.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
ln
addition,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
, like rodents,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
in the dispersal of plant seeds and in the pollination of plants. By protecting endangered
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
, we ensure not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
their survival
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
the biodiversity
that is
necessary for the ecological health of the planet.

Secondly
, wild
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
provide
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
valuable substances such as medicine and fur. The horn of the rhinoceros has medicinal value and the fur of the mink is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
valuable. The recreational viewing of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
at zoos is
also
a source of revenue.
Thus
, the financial value of wild species is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to the economies of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
nations.

Furthermore
, wild
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
have aesthetic
Possible agreement error -- use past participle here: "appealed".
appeal
. They are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
creatures of nature and are a part of our bio-diversity. Their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
and mysterious life has enchanted mankind since the dawn of evolution. Scientists have
been awed
, by observing their
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
. Such study has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
scientists understand how the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
body functions and why
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
behave as they do. Scientists have
also
gained medical knowledge by studying the effect of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
drugs on these animals.

Finally
, it is undeniable that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animal
species have been vanishing at a much faster rate for about a century
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
due to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
factors such as pollution, commercial overexploitation, poaching and deforestation.
Knowingly
or
unknowingly
, we
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
are doing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
much damage to plants and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
that working for their conservation has become a necessity.

To sum up, it can
be reiterated
that saving all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animal
species on the verge of extinction is well justified. All
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
have direct or indirect relation to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
we should not work to save
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
only
those few species, which have a visible effect on
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
humans
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If we spoke a different language, we would perceive a somewhat different world.
Ludwig Wittgenstein

IELTS essay Animals are in danger of extinction. Some people say that we should protect only those animals, which are useful to humans.

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
448 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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