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An increasing no. of people are buying what they need online. What are the advantages and disadvantages. v.1

An increasing no. of people are buying what they need online. What are the advantages and disadvantages. v. 1
ECommerce business has been in vogue through the recent times. Started as a word of mouth, it has florist in myriads and is widespread in almost all major cities throughout the world. To contemplate the growing demands of e-shopping, we can pin down plenty of its benefits. The first and foremost would be that it saves us time from waiting in lines for hours or outside try rooms or even on traffic signals in some cases. Moreover, while we shop online there are no barriers or chain system to go through which involves wholesale, retailers etc. Thereby creating a direct link between the seller and the buyer which eventually helps us in saving money. There is a plethora of brands and sizes to choose from and we can also customize our choice with ease. Although, online shopping is turning out to be a boon to the society and it offers a variety of discounts, but we must sometimes look upon the darker aspects of this. While e-shopping we sometimes confuse our size, colour or even the material. This may not seem to be precise at times and we might want to return the item which again takes a lot of our time and energy. There may be products with discounts, but we must not also forget about the delivery charges for minimal items to be purchased. In addition to this, there have been cases of fraudulent transactions on some sites which look genuine and sometimes we may not be sure about the authentication of the commodity. To deduce this to conclusion, eCommerce, business has bought a rest to immense chaos while shopping but at the same time it questions about the authenticity and unadulteration of the products.
Possible spelling mistake found.
ECommerce
business has been in vogue through the recent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Started
as a word of mouth, it has florist in myriads and is widespread in almost all major cities throughout the world.

To contemplate the growing demands of e-shopping, we can pin down
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of its benefits. The
first
and foremost would be that it saves us
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
from waiting in lines for hours or outside try rooms or even on traffic signals in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
cases.
Moreover
, while we shop online there are no barriers or chain system to go through which involves wholesale, retailers etc. Thereby creating a direct link between the seller and the buyer which
eventually
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
us in saving money. There is a plethora of brands and sizes to choose
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
from and
we can
also
customize our choice with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ease
.

Although, online shopping is turning out to be a boon to the society and it offers a variety of discounts,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
look upon the darker aspects of this. While e-shopping we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
confuse our size,
Possible spelling mistake. 'colour' is British English.
colour
or even the material. This may not seem to be precise at
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
times and
we might want to return the item which again takes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and energy. There may be products with discounts,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
not
also
forget about the delivery charges for minimal items to be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchased
.
In addition
to this, there have been cases of fraudulent transactions on
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
sites which look genuine and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
we may not be sure about the authentication of the commodity.

To deduce this to conclusion,
Possible spelling mistake found.
eCommerce
, business has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
a rest to immense chaos while shopping
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
at the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
it questions about the authenticity and
Possible spelling mistake found.
unadulteration
of the products.
5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Mistakes
The limits of my language are the limits of my world.
Ludwig Wittgenstein

IELTS essay An increasing no. of people are buying what they need online. What are the advantages and disadvantages. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
287 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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