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Although more and more people read news on the Internet, newspapers will remain the most important source of news. Do you agree or disagree? v.14

The amount numnber of people using the internet has recenntly increased massively thoughout the world, which means the traditional newpapers are facing to the huge rival. I personally believe that the internet news will be soon as important as traditional press. On the one hand, quite a few people believe that the traditional newpapers plays an important source of information despite of technology evolution. Firstly, reading newspapers is the easiest way to approach information because not everyone in the world able to access the internet especialy in rural areas. Secondly, the old or elderly people who are not good at using the computer tend to read news as a traditional way. In addition, the quality of internet news sometimes are not reliable. This means that there are a great deal of editted sources in the internet have not been verified, leading to the confusions for readers. Howerver, the internet are more likely to become popular as traditonal press for some reasons. The first reason is that the internet allows us to update a variety of different comunications anytime wherever we are by using the smart phones or devices. It means that reading new on the internet is not only save your time and also more convienient. Another reason is that the internet could brings the chance to share news to others, give their own opinions. For example, facebook and twitter are two popular platforms that everyone usually post and update information. Finally, online press might help us to protect the environment by reducing the raw material for papers prodution. In conclution, although traditional newpapers remains significantly source of news, I personaly believe that the internet will soon be equally important.
The amount
Possible spelling mistake found.
numnber
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
using the internet has
Possible spelling mistake found.
recenntly
increased
massively
Possible spelling mistake found.
thoughout
the world, which means the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
Possible spelling mistake found.
newpapers
are facing to the huge rival. I
personally
believe that the internet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
will be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
press. On the one hand, quite a few
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
Possible spelling mistake found.
newpapers
plays an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
source of information
Did you mean “despite” (or, alternatively, ‘in spite of’)?
despite of
technology evolution.
Firstly
, reading newspapers is the easiest way to approach information
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
not everyone in the world able to access the internet
Possible spelling mistake found.
especialy
in rural areas.
Secondly
, the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
or elderly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who are not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
at using the computer tend to read
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
as a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
way.
In addition
, the quality of internet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
The adverb ‘sometimes’ usually goes after the verb ‘are’.
sometimes are
not reliable. This means that there are a great
Possible agreement error. Did you mean “deals”?
deal
of
Possible spelling mistake found.
editted
sources
The usual collocation for technology is “on”, not “in”.
in the internet
have not
been verified
, leading to the confusions for readers.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Howerver
, the internet are more likely to become popular as
Possible spelling mistake found.
traditonal
press for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
reasons. The
first
reason is that the internet
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
us to update a variety of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
Possible spelling mistake found.
comunications
anytime wherever we are by using the
Nowadays it’s more common to write this as one word.
smart phones
or devices. It means that reading
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
on the internet is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
The word “save” is a verb. Did you mean the adjective “safe”?
save
your time and
also
more
Possible spelling mistake found.
convienient
. Another reason is that the internet could
The modal verb ‘could’ requires the verb’s base form.
brings
the chance to share
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
to others, give their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
opinions.
For example
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
facebook
and
Did you mean “Twitter” (= microblogging service, capitalized)?
twitter
are two popular platforms that everyone
usually
post and update information.
Finally
, online press might
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us to protect the environment by reducing the raw material for papers
Possible spelling mistake found.
prodution
. In
Possible spelling mistake found.
conclution
, although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
traditional
Possible spelling mistake found.
newpapers
remains
significantly
source of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
, I
Possible spelling mistake found.
personaly
believe that the internet will
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
be
equally
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
.
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IELTS essay Although more and more people read the news on the Internet, newspapers will remain the most important source of news for the majority of people.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
280 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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