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more and more people read the news on the internet, newspapers will remain the most important source of news for the majority of people. Do you agree or disagree? v.1

more and more people read the news on the internet, newspapers will remain the most important source of news for the majority of people. v. 1
We are currently facing the most critical environmental issues in human history. Many are of the opinion that the major concern for the environment is losing some kinds of plants and animals, while others argue that serious problems such as air pollution and overpopulation should be made a priority. In my opinion, although saving threatened species is highly significant, I believe that humans should pay more attention to other growing issues. Humans have always been responsible for causing changes in the environment and hurt plants and animal. At the present-world, a large number of plants and animals are in danger of extinction for a wide variety of reasons. A group of people believes that this issue is the most important environmental problem, because the disappearance of specific kinds of plants or animals has negative impacts on the ecosystem which consists of a community of living organisms. When this natural system being affected by certain reasons, the food chain would not work properly or may even fall apart, so it would have direct effects on human health and lifestyle. On the other hand, other problems exist aside from just loss of species. For instance, air pollution and overpopulation are rising super fast which results environmental tragedies. Every day people release a ton of toxic gases into the air by energy consumption. In addition, the growth of the population over the past decade made an undesirable condition of living. A population boom could lead to food shortage and more diseases. These major issues require serious actions. In conclusion, while the extinction of certain plants and animals is one of the biggest concerns of the present-day world, certain people believe that environmental problems like air pollution and overpopulation should be more prioritized. Personally, I agree with the latter group, and I believe that there should be more responsibility for solving other environmental issues, like air pollution and overpopulation, then saving endangered species.
We are
currently
facing the most critical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issues
in human history.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
are of the opinion that the major concern for the environment is losing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
kinds of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plants
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
, while others argue that serious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
such as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
overpopulation
should
be made
a priority. In my opinion, although saving threatened species is
highly
significant, I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that humans should pay more attention to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
growing issues.

Humans have always been responsible for causing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in the environment and hurt
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plants
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animal
. At the present-world,
Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use "many" or "numerous"
a large number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plants
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
are in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
danger
of extinction for a wide variety of reasons. A group of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believes
that this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
is the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problem
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
the disappearance of specific kinds of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plants
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impacts on the ecosystem which consists of a community of living organisms. When this natural system being
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
by certain reasons, the food chain would not work
properly
or may even fall apart,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it would have direct effects on human health and lifestyle.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
exist aside from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
loss of species.
For instance
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
overpopulation
are rising super
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
which results
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
tragedies. Every day
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
release a ton of toxic gases into the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
by energy consumption.
In addition
, the growth of the population over the past decade made an undesirable condition of living. A population boom could lead to food shortage and more diseases. These major
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issues
require serious actions.

In conclusion
, while the extinction of certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plants
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
is one of the biggest concerns of the present-day world, certain
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
like
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
overpopulation
should be more prioritized.
Personally
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the latter group, and I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that there should be more responsibility for solving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issues
, like
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
overpopulation
, then saving endangered species.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
If you talk to a man in a language he understands, that goes to his head. If you talk to him in his own language, that goes to his heart.
Nelson Mandela

IELTS essay more and more people read the news on the internet, newspapers will remain the most important source of news for the majority of people. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
319 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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