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alternative energy sources that use the natural power of the wind, waves and sun are too expensive and complicated to replace the coal, oil and gas that we use to power our cities and transport. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this option? v.2

alternative energy sources that use the natural power of the wind, waves and sun are too expensive and complicated to replace the coal, oil and gas that we use to power our cities and transport. with this option? v. 2
It is argued that using renewable potential for industry and consumerism is not cheap and even quite challenging to substitute fossil fuel like gas, oil, . . While I accept that this change has several obstacles, I also believe it could be create a dramatic breakthrough in the industry of capacity. On the one hand, alternative capacity resources could cause some drawbacks. Firstly, the process of applying these, capacity capacity is likely to be unpractical in some parts of the world. For example, solar capacity can't work at night as well as couldn't be used in cold climate areas where the sunlight is pretty rare. In addition, not every country has a coastline, river or windy hills which are geographical requirements for creating the alternatives. Secondly, this change also entail expensive research and development. The government budget, which comes from tax revenues could be allocated for more fields. This means the expenditure for spreading renewable capacity out is limited and might be not enough to complete the process. By contrast, if it receives more money, the spending for others like education and medicine might be cut down considerably. On the other hand, I believe the discovery of the alternatives can be seen as a great thing in the context of lacking of fossil fuel. People don't need to be worried about dwindling supplies of progressively more expensive resources. Solar capacity, for instance, would never run out. It creates free electricity, although their initial cost must be paid off. More than that, these sources can help to mitigate the toxic emissions released into the air. Because the manufacturing process no longer produces CO2, N2, . . Which can be harmful to the environment. That lead to no further air pollution or any risks of environmental contamination. In a nutshell, for these reasons mentioned above, I would argue that alternative energy sources are both beneficial and detrimental.
It
is argued
that using renewable potential for industry and consumerism is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cheap
and even quite challenging
Did you mean "substituting"? Or maybe you should add a pronoun? In active voice, 'challenge' + 'to' takes an object, usually a pronoun.
to substitute
fossil fuel like gas, oil
Did you just mean "," or "."?
, .
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
While I accept that this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
has several obstacles, I
also
believe it could be
Consider using the past participle "created"?
create
a dramatic breakthrough in the industry of capacity.

On the one hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alternative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
capacity
resources could cause
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
drawbacks.
Firstly
, the process of applying these,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
capacity
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
capacity
is likely to be unpractical in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
parts of the world.
For example
, solar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
capacity
can't work at night
as well
as couldn't be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cold
climate areas where the sunlight is pretty rare.
In addition
, not every country has a coastline, river or windy hills which are geographical requirements for creating the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alternatives
.
Secondly
, this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
also
entail expensive research and development. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
budget, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
from tax revenues could
be allocated
for more fields. This means the expenditure for spreading renewable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
capacity
out
is limited
and might be not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
to complete the process. By contrast, if it receives more money, the spending for others like education and medicine might be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
down
considerably
.

On the other hand
, I believe the discovery of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alternatives
can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
as a great thing in the context of lacking of fossil fuel.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
don't need to
be worried
about dwindling supplies of
progressively
more expensive resources. Solar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
capacity
,
for instance
, would never run out. It creates free electricity, although their initial cost
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be paid
off. More than that, these sources can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to mitigate the toxic emissions released into the air.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
the manufacturing process no longer produces CO2, N2
Did you just mean "," or "."?
, .
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
“Which” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Which
can be harmful to the environment. That lead to no
further
air pollution or any
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risks
of environmental contamination.

In a nutshell, for these reasons mentioned above, I would argue that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
alternative
energy sources are both beneficial and detrimental.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay alternative energy sources that use the natural power of the wind, waves and sun are too expensive and complicated to replace the coal, oil and gas that we use to power our cities and transport. with this option? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
315 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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